Over the course of her twenty-six years on Earth (version C), Lindsay Lohan has learned that she is bad at many things. She is bad at not breaking the law. She is bad at managing her temper. She is bad at Liz Taylor.
So maybe it's time for Lindsay Lohan to find something she's good at. Maybe it's time for Lindsay Lohan to open a "high-end Mexican restaurant" in Tribeca.
Tribeca Citizen writes that Lindsay Lohan has been spotted twice curling like a smoke monster around the interior of a soon-to-be vacated commercial space located at 39 N. Moore St.
A tipster reported that Lohan was wandering around the place, talking about where she'd like to put a bar and where she'd like to put a DJ booth. The building is said to be the future home of "a high-end Mexican restaurant."
Now, there's obviously no guarantee that Lindsay Lohan is planning to open a high-end Mexican restaurant in Tribeca.
Maybe one of her friends is, and she just dropped by to give some advice about restaurant layout because she has seen many a restaurant layout in her day. (Lobster tank in front where people can pick their lobsters! "The Captain's Corner" where parties of 20 or more can host birthdays or business lunches! A sign outside that reads "Red Lobster" !)
Maybe Lindsay Lohan just identifies where she would put a bar and DJ booth in every room she enters, like how some people always make a note of the exits.
But you know what? She should. Because who wouldn't want to see Lindsay Lohan pursue her passion of up market Latin American cuisine with a Long Island twist? Who wouldn't want to visit El Ohan on a Friday night, in the hopes that you might see Lindsay Lohan smack a hostess in the face? Who doesn't like high-end Mexican food?
Lindsay, querida, we support your high-end dream.
Put the DJ Booth far away from the bathrooms.