Last night's installment of MTV's unfailingly sensitive and absurd depiction of the real issues of today's youth, True Life, focused on tanning addiction. Its two Oompa Loompa-hued subjects were dim even by the standards of this show, even though their skin shone brightly. Alyssa is 18, from Monroe, Connecticut and says things like, "A good tan to me means I can't even determine what race I am," and "Everyone in my life thinks I look disgusting." Billy is 19, from Franklin Square, NY (that's on Long Island, of course), goes to school in Orlando, and refuses to go cold turkey when told by a dermatologist to quit tanning (his resolution to quit going to tanning beds because he's "not dumb" and then almost immediate reversal was the episode's high point). Both are frivolous young people who found tanning, and then MTV found them. This may not represent the American dream, but theirs is an American dream.