Ladies, rejoice: Alexander Farennikov, a Los Angeles engineer and innovator of frivolous whimsies, has invented a bra dryer. "What is a bra dryer?" you ask. Well, it's basically a boob-shaped blow dryer, something you've always wanted.
Farennikov says he was inspired to this noble cause, when a female friend complained about what a "hassle" it is to dry bras. By all accounts, the two most frequently employed methods to dry bras involve throwing them in a dryer or simply leaving them on a clothes rack if they're fancy, methods that require all the effort and hassle of monitoring paint dry.
But technology can make even the simplest things easier—and much more expensive—for the female consumer. The Ricasol Bra Dryer looks to be part warrior breast-plate and part honeycomb, as if some bees got distracted by the human female form one afternoon. The Bra Dryer website breaks down the benefits of its namesake invention into three basic advantages. Ricasol promises that the dryer:
- "Preserves the shape of your bras (because you and your shape deserve it)
- Dries your bra quickly (so you can do other tasks!)
- Provides you with more free time (allowing you to get ready for the day, go on a date, or be more productive on other tasks in general)"
Farennikov has spent four years working on the new-and-improved Bra Dryer 2.0; the first version was released in 2009 and never made it to production. This one, he claims, is more visually pleasing, less expensive to produce, and adaptable to brassiere sizes from A to H (Gizmodo questioned this sizing issue upon the 2009 announcement).
The design simplicity of Bra Dryer 2.0 is remarkable: drape the brassiere over the boob protrusions, set the temperature and air flow to your liking and wait about half an hour. Oh! And spend $150 to $200 on this stupid, largely useless contraption you will certainly have to hide in your home, or possibly pretend is some fancy post-modern art.