Recently, a woman named Christina was asked to babble about her food fetish at a taping of Steve Harvey. Christina, who talks like a mama grizzly but eats like Yogi, started off by saying, "Welp, food excites me, and I mean it excites me." You see where this is going? She's talking about downtown.

"I look up cheesecakes and cupcakes," she went on. "And those little meringues with," and here I have no idea what she says but it sounds like "the shawn tortes." Oh right, those. The lil' shawns. At this point, she just started making stuff up, as she continued, "And the strawberry shortcakes with the juicy cherries on top." I think she's getting strawberries and cherries mixed up, which is weird since she seems to know enough about the function of each (one is for shortcakes, the other is for on top of everything else except for strawberry shortcakes because they already have strawberries on top). For a noted food enthusiast, Christina is suspiciously imprecise.

The climax of Christina's food rhapsody came, of course, when she described her favorite food's role in achieving her orgasm: "If he's not doing what he's supposed to in there, I start thinking, ‘Popeyes spicy, Popeyes spicy, Popeyes spicy,' and it gets me where I need to be." Cool. "Is it weird that just the thought of Popeyes spicy chicken gets me to climax?" Yes. That is really weird. And that's what makes you beautiful, Christina.


[via Uproxx]