Why Is the Guardian Lying About the Pope’s Trees?

The Guardian today, picking up on a paper in Nature, reports that scientists have calculated that there are more than “3tn” trees on Earth. The “3tn” means three trillion. What does “trillion” mean in British English? Did they give up on that “billion”-means-“trillion”/“trillion”-means-“quintillion” nonsense yet? … »9/02/15 2:55pm46 minutes ago

This Week In Tabloids: Christine Ouzounian Leaves Her Pregnancy Tests Everywhere

Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we get a text message from our best friend Jennifer Aniston that says, “:-\ Justin and I r getting a divorce,” sigh, roll our eyes, respond, “Awww bb want me to come over?” to which she responds, “sure, but i’m fine alone,” sigh again, roll our eyes again, hop in the car and head over… »9/02/15 2:44pm57 minutes ago

The New York Times Is Suddenly No Longer Above Reading Someone's Hacked Emails

When hackers dumped an unfathomably large trove of internal materials from Sony Pictures on the internet last December, it created a feeding frenzy among reporters—unless you worked at the New York Times, which took a moral stance against touching stolen goods. Today, the Times has a big story explicitly based on… »9/02/15 2:30pmToday 2:30pm

Today's Best Deals: Cheaper Shoes, Nest Closeout, Bike Gear, and More

Here are the best of today’s deals. Get every great deal every day on Kinja Deals, follow us on Facebook and Twitter to never miss a deal, join us on Kinja Gear to read about great products, and on Kinja Co-Op to help us find the best. »9/02/15 2:15pmToday 2:15pm

Baltimore Judge Refuses to Drop Charges Against Freddie Gray Cops

Wednesday morning, Judge Barry Williams refused to drop the charges against the six Baltimore police officers accused of being responsible for Freddie Gray’s death. Williams also denied a motion to recuse Baltimore State’s Attorney Marilyn J. Mosby from the case.
»9/02/15 12:20pmToday 12:20pm

Surprise Military Reunions At NFL Games Reach Peak Bullshit

During last weekend’s preseason St. Louis Rams game, a familiar ritual played out: With a stadium full of fans and a television audience watching, Rams cheerleader Candace Ruocco Valentine was surprised by the arrival of her husband August Valentine, a Marine Corps first lieutenant, who had just returned home from… »9/02/15 12:05pmToday 12:05pm

Vroom Vroom: California Uber Drivers Can Proceed With Their Class Action

A federal judge ruled Tuesday that the California Uber drivers suing the company for employee benefits can proceed with their lawsuit as a class action. District Court Judge Edward Chen certified a class of plaintiffs that includes “all UberBlack, UberX, and UberSUV drivers who have driven for Uber in the state of… »9/02/15 11:55amToday 11:55am

Was Banning Tyler, the Creator, the Victory International Feminism Needed?

On Sunday, August 23, Tyler, the Creator, was riding through France on the nicest tour bus he’d ever rented—a giant TV screen, a circle couch, extra beds—and heading towards the end of what was meant to be a month-long tour of Europe, reveling in the amenities his hard work had afforded him. The 24-year-old Los… »9/02/15 11:34amToday 11:34am

LIRR Service Is All Fucked Up, As Revelation Foretold 

For 90 minutes this morning, Long Island Rail Road service was suspended coming into and going out of Penn Station due to “signal trouble.” For 90 minutes this morning, LIRR riders inundated the E, 7, and 2/3 subway lines, as the MTA cross-honored their LIRR fares. For 90 minutes this morning, Satan was released from… »9/02/15 11:02amToday 11:02am

Pollsters Agree: Donald Trump Voters Who Hate Donald Trump May Exist, Probably Don't, Who Knows, Anything's Possible

The Politico today introduces us to a few (potential) Donald Trump protest voters who are motivated not by actual affection for the nativist cartoon plutocrat, but by contempt for the entire institution of electoral politics. These “Haters For Trump,” as The Politico dubs them, consider Trump to be a grotesque, racist… »9/02/15 10:51amToday 10:51am

Court Docs: Subway Jared’s Pedophile Friend Invited Woman to Have Sex With Animal

Russell Taylor, the former director of Jared Fogle’s anti-childhood obesity charity who yesterday pleaded guilty to child pornography charges, once tried to lure a woman to his house to have sex with an animal, according to court documents obtained by the Indy Star.
»9/02/15 10:26amToday 10:26am

Woman Pulls Gun on Teens at Park, Claims It Was for Self-Defense

A woman who pulled a gun on three teenagers in a suburban St. Louis park last Wednesday claimed it was just for self-defense, but said she would have used the weapon if she had to. The incident was the climax of a neighborhood dispute that had been building since earlier that day, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported. »9/02/15 10:10amToday 10:10am