Why Would Ashton Kutcher Photoshop a Tweet About a Startup?

Yesterday evening, Ashton Kutcher tweeted out a photo of a "brain sensing headband" called Muse, telling his 16.3 million followers that he was: "Excited to learn from this incredible technology." Kutcher didn't mention that he's an investor, or why his name appears to be photoshopped onto the product. » 7/23/14 2:53pm 11 minutes ago

Nathan For You Figures Out How to Sell Alcohol to Minors

Ingeniously dumb comedian Nathan Fielder has returned with season 2 of Nathan For You, the show where he very awkwardly attempts to rehabilitate struggling local businesses, and it's off to a great start. He's already helped a liquor store reach a huge untapped market: Underage suckers. » 7/23/14 2:47pm 18 minutes ago

Attorneys Ask Kid Rock to Bring Them Insane Clown Posse's Glass Dildo

Earlier this week, Kid Rock peered at his glass dildo and nodded solemnly, his eyes welling. He knew this day would one day come, but he was blindsided nonetheless. If the young blonde in his bed saw the tear roll down his cheek, she wouldn't have known why. Kid was keeping this secret deep inside: he had been » 7/23/14 2:40pm 25 minutes ago

If TaskRabbit Is the Future of Employment, the Employed Are Fucked

The employment of the future is here, and it's terrific for everyone except the people doing the work. TaskRabbit, which lets you outsource the things you don't want to do to people who need money, is at the forefront of this chore revolution, and it's already making some lives harder. » 7/23/14 1:49pm Today 1:49pm

Andrew Cuomo’s Ethics Panel Exposes Andrew Cuomo’s Shadiness

Last year, Andrew Cuomo, the Democratic governor of New York, assembled an independent ethics panel to expose the pernicious, deep-rooted culture of corruption in Albany. In its own way, it worked: Today’s New York Times has a big feature recounting how Cuomo sought to steer—and in some cases quash—the panel’s… » 7/23/14 1:30pm Today 1:30pm

Here Are 9 More Media Companies That Test Employees for Drugs

Earlier this month, Gawker named eight big media companies that continue to screen prospective employees for drug consumption. This drew dozens of emails and hundreds of comments from working journalists willing to talk about their own company’s testing practices. It’s time to spill their secrets. » 7/23/14 1:08pm Today 1:08pm

NRA: Let's Make Schoolkids Shoot Guns "to Advance to the Next Grade"

You may have noticed that we have a school shooting problem. Well, not according to the NRA. But if we did have a school shooting problem, the NRA has a plan: Create "gun-required zones" and gun-welfare programs, and make weapons training "necessary to advance to the next grade" for Sally and Timmy. » 7/23/14 1:00pm Today 1:00pm

Justin Bieber Accused of Cutting Disneyland Lines in Bogus Wheelchair

Canadian petty crimelord Justin Bieber was pushed around Disneyland in a wheelchair over the weekend, causing wild speculation that not only is he a sarcastic little asshole, he's also an unfair line-jumper and a blight on the Happiest Place on Earth. "Justin Bieber + wheelchair + Disneyland = I get to cut to the… » 7/23/14 12:50pm Today 12:50pm

John Travolta's Alleged Ex-Boyfriend Sues for Right To Kiss and Tell

When pilot Doug Gotterba spilled the tea on his alleged six-year affair with alleged man who sleeps with men John Travolta to the National Enquirer in 2012, Travolta's camp slapped him with a cease and desist. That's about as revealing as Travolta himself walking right up to Gotterba, slapping him on the face with… » 7/23/14 12:38pm Today 12:38pm