Homophobes Freak Out Over Gay Batman Rumor

On Monday, totally fake and not real "satire" site National Report published an article claiming they had obtained a leaked script of the upcoming Superman Vs. Batman [sic]: Dawn Of Justice, one that portrayed the Dark Knight as "an out-and-proud homosexual." Naturally, Internet bigots treated the report with their… » 7/24/14 4:48pm Just now

Is This a Dick in This Real Estate Listing, or What?

There is a five bedroom, four bathroom three-story condo at 5517 Oakwood Cove in Austin available for the price of $389,500. One of the bathrooms is pictured, and you can see that some changes need to be made. The wallpaper could be scrapped. The fixtures could be updated. Oh, and the dude with his dick hanging out… » 7/24/14 4:40pm 9 minutes ago

The Crazy Emails That Took Down NSA Spook John Schindler

Remember John Schindler, the conservative talking head, retired NSA spook, and Naval War College professor who briefly went incognito after screenshots of (what appear to be) his penis leaked onto the Internet? While he has since reappeared to Twitter—where he first drew attention for defending domestic spying and… » 7/24/14 4:29pm 20 minutes ago

Fifty Shades' Real Problem: Jamie Dornan Is Hotter Than Christian Grey

The Fifty Shades of Grey trailer is upon us, and while it doesn't reveal much from the Red Room of Pain, it does come wih the startling discovery that Jamie Dornan's been stripped of his hair and turned into a sanitized, shaved, waxed version of himself. » 7/24/14 4:25pm 23 minutes ago

The All-American Expo That Invaded Cold War Russia

Over the course of six weeks during the height of the Cold War, almost three million Soviets visited an exhibition that celebrated America. American kitchens, American art, American cars, and most especially American capitalism. The American National Exhibition in Moscow was a full-court press to convince the Soviet… » 7/24/14 4:05pm 44 minutes ago

How Would Christianity Deal with Extraterrestrial Life?

How would the world's religions react to the discovery of extraterrestrial intelligence? There is, of course, no single answer. But for Christians who believe in the redemption of humanity through a singular event—the Incarnation of God through Christ—the question poses an especially complex dilemma. » 7/24/14 3:54pm 55 minutes ago

Chemtrails Don't Exist and Shasta County Is Ground Zero for Stupid

The makers of Reynolds Wrap are thrilled to announce the latest loony chapter in the long running battle against chemtrails, with residents of Shasta County, California DEMANDING that their county stop the federal government from spraying them with non-existent chemicals. L'horreur! » 7/24/14 3:17pm Today 3:17pm

Hazing Investigation: Ohio State Band Members Are Horny And Depraved

The Ohio State University marching band is in some shit after an investigation revealed the band to be more or less Porky's with tubas and kettle drums. A report stemming from the university's two-month investigation has quite a few details on the internal goings-on of the Best Damn Band in the Land, including the… » 7/24/14 3:14pm Today 3:14pm

Osama bin Laden Murdered JFK Jr., Reports Shiny, Stapled Pages at 7-11

Star, a tentacle of tabloid kraken American Media, Inc., has a special "Who Shot JFK Jr.!" issue out. (No question mark!) Their answer: "Muslim terror kingpin Osama bin Laden." Or the Mob. Also, LBJ killed JFK, they report. It is a breathless corroboration of the far Right's favorite JFK conspiracy phantasies. » 7/24/14 2:59pm Today 2:59pm

Tinder Is Full of Robot Prostitutes

I moved back to New York from Cairo in January of 2014, and among the biggest culture shocks was American Tinder. In Cairo, there was the occasional woman, mostly Russian tourists on holiday, using the mobile dating app; in New York, I met a torrent of instant flirtation. Patterns emerged: apparently almost every… » 7/24/14 2:45pm Today 2:45pm

Checking In With 15 Former Stars of Undressed, 15 Years Later

Undressed rightfully earned its smut because it was not smutty. It had no shame, only the complications produced by its characters' misplaced sense of the same. It had the lowest possible stakes (there's a joke among fans that the show was lit by a string of Christmas lights), so it invited the largest swath of… » 7/24/14 2:40pm Today 2:40pm

The 10 Worst New Yorker #Longreads

The New Yorker, a magazine, has just opened its Internet "archives" (dating back to 2007) as a readers' jubilee in advance of its upcoming move to the world of paywalled journalism, three months hence. So much New Yorker to muck around in! So many words! So many stories! So many stories with so many words in them! » 7/24/14 2:25pm Today 2:25pm