Why Do People Hit Their Kids?

There's an old episode of What's Happening!! where Roger fucks up, and his mom decides to beat his ass (this is actually the plot of every episode of What's Happening!!). So his mom asks Rerun for his belt, only Rerun is 300-plus pounds, so when he takes out his belt, it's like eight feet long. And Roger's mom… » 9/16/14 2:02pm 41 minutes ago

Southwestern United States Braces for a Major Flash Flooding Repeat

Tropical Storm Odile is trucking through the Gulf of California this afternoon after striking the Baja Peninsula as a major hurricane on Sunday night. The storm's remnants will move into the southwestern U.S. over the next few days, potentially creating a repeat of last week's major flash flooding. » 9/16/14 1:52pm 51 minutes ago

Dead Rapper, Thought to Be Running Scams, Was Actually Dead

After a year-plus of mystery, it appears that the story of Tim Dog—the '90s rapper who was reported dead last February, then thought to have faked his death and disappeared in order to escape debt after running elaborate scams on a number of women—has reached a conclusion, and it was the one we thought all along. » 9/16/14 12:55pm Today 12:55pm

Cougar Town Star Leaves Cougar Town, Which Is Still on TV

The final season premiere of shambling TBS zombie show Cougar Town will feature one rat deserting the ship early, taking his boat and his Penny Can with him. TV Line reports that Brian Van Holt—Courteney Cox's ex-husband on the show and ex-boyfriend in real life—will be leaving in the season premiere, set for early… » 9/16/14 12:45pm Today 12:45pm

Chelsea Manning Breaks Silence to Criticize U.S. Airstrikes on ISIS

Chelsea Manning, the U.S. soldier currently serving a 35-year prison sentence for leaking government documents to WikiLeaks, wrote a column for The Guardian criticizing Obama's approach to ISIS. "Based on my experience as an all-source analyst in Iraq during the organization's relative infancy, ISIS cannot be defeated… » 9/16/14 12:05pm Today 12:05pm

The Brilliant Plan to Build a Gondola From Williamsburg to Manhattan

Williamsburg has a problem. The neighborhood's become so popular so quickly that some fear local infrastructure will buckle under the exploding population. Anybody who's ridden the L train lately knows this problem all too well. But that's nothing a few crazy people and a gondola can't solve. » 9/16/14 11:58am Today 11:58am

​Netflix Buys Two Seasons of Judd Apatow Comedy Starring Gillian Jacobs

Deadline reports that Netflix just bought two seasons upfront of a Judd Apatow-produced comedy called Love, which will star Community's Gillian Jacobs and writer/improv actor Paul Rust. The subject of the comedy will be: Love. Specifically, ten episodes about it in 2016, and twelve episodes about it in 2017. The… » 9/16/14 11:46am Today 11:46am

Gossip Triumphs Over Illiteracy Thanks to The Emoji Tatler

Language has been called "mankind's greatest invention," tied for first place alongside Chicken Fries, which are back. The bronze, then, must surely go to writing: a system by which the fleeting echoes of speech are captured and made visible, so that the ephemeral may be recreated with absolute accuracy by strangers… » 9/16/14 11:32am Today 11:32am

Disgruntled Teen Worker Rubs Balls on Stuffed-Crust Hawaiian Pizza

Austin Michael Symonds, an 18-year-old employee of a Papa Murphy's pizzeria in Georgetown, Texas, was arrested by police last week after he was allegedly caught by a customer rubbing his scrotum on a pizza order. According to the arrest warrant obtained by the Austin American-Statesman, the customer confronted the… » 9/16/14 10:27am Today 10:27am