America's Ugliest Accent: Scranton vs. NOLA; Tallahassee vs. Minneapolis

Welcome to another edition of America's Ugliest Accent, where we as a country gather together to determine which of us in this great nation of disgusting vocal squalor has the least listenable accent. Every day this week, Round One of the Tournament, we'll be presenting two face-offs between cities. You, humble… » 9/30/14 12:00pm 18 minutes ago

School Says Horny Teens Can't Focus If Girls Wear Jeggings

A North Dakota high school has banned female students from wearing leggings, jeggings, or tight jeans, citing concerns that such attire can be distracting to their male classmates, and also makes girls look too much like a pre-bathtub-scene Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. » 9/30/14 11:50am 28 minutes ago

Oozing Nine-Pound Hairball Removed From Teen's Stomach

Earlier this month, doctors reportedly performed life-saving surgery to remove a nine-pound hairball from an 18-year-old girl's stomach. The huge hairball was apparently the result of the teen compulsively eating bits of her own hair and wool chunks from a carpet. Fair warning: Pictures of the bloody hunk of hair and… » 9/30/14 11:15am Today 11:15am

Cop Indicted in Killing of Black Man Parked in His Own Driveway

Last week, Levar Jones, an unarmed black man, was shot by a South Carolina police officer during a routine traffic stop. Fortunately, Jones survived the encounter. In February, however, Ernest Satterwhite, another unarmed black man who encountered a similarly trigger-happy S.C. cop, wasn't so lucky— the cop shot and… » 9/30/14 11:08am Today 11:08am

Pastor's Son Denies Gwen Stefani His Delicious Package on The Voice

John Martin is a 25-year old pastor's son, forklift operator, skilled whistler, and rather attractive human. And in a three-way bidding war, he is ogled outwardly by Blake and subliminally by Gwen, who gets very descriptive in explaining why she wants him on her team. » 9/30/14 10:53am Today 10:53am

Amanda Bynes on Adderall, Likely Extremely Focused During Arrest: Report

Amanda Bynes was having a relatively quiet 2014 until yesterday, when she was arrested for driving under the influence of a "controlled substance." Today, TMZ reports that the substance was a stimulant: Adderall. She may have also been smoking weed. » 9/30/14 10:15am Today 10:15am

Number One Singles of the Past Decade, Ranked

The Billboard Hot 100 has tracked the most popular songs in the U.S. since 1958, compiled from weekly from sales, radio airplay, and (starting in 2005) streaming data. The Hot 100 is popular music's analog to the box office or Nielsen ratings; ostensibly, these are the songs Americans spent the most money and time… » 9/30/14 10:06am Today 10:06am

Are Anti-Vaccinators Stupid or Disingenuous? A Q&A With Eula Biss

It's not often that you find a literary essayist wandering into contemporary political debates, these days. But in her new book On Immunity: An Innoculation, Eula Biss wades calmly, lucidly into a subject that has most people screaming in under 15 seconds on talk shows: vaccination. » 9/30/14 9:58am Today 9:58am

Ben Affleck's Kids Give as Much of a Shit as You Do That He's Batman

Last summer, the world reeled at the news that Ben Affleck had been cast as an especially sad version of beloved DC Comics superhero Batman. But with Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice pushed back to 2016, everyone eventually stopped giving a shit. Also not giving a shit: Affleck's three kids. » 9/30/14 9:46am Today 9:46am

Jealous Principal Snakes Her Way into Teen's Amazing Laser Cat Photo

Schenectady High School teen hero Draven Rodriguez petitioned to have a highly stylized photo of himself and his cat, Mr. Bigglesworth, be included as his senior portrait in the school's yearbook. Instead, he took a second photo at the behest of the school principal that will run on her page and also include her dog,… » 9/30/14 9:26am Today 9:26am

Your Guide to Binge-Watching Gilmore Girls on Netflix

Gilmore Girls, the perfect series that continues to bring together girls who thought they were smart in high school, is coming to Netflix tomorrow. Every episode, every pop culture reference, and every town event will soon be more accessible than coffee at Luke's Diner, when Luke and Lorelai are not in a fight. Here's… » 9/30/14 9:02am Today 9:02am

Chiefs Safety Husain Abdullah Flagged For Muslim-Prayer TD Celebration

Kansas City Chiefs safety Husain Abdullah was flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct Monday night when he went to his knees in prayer to celebrate a Tom Brady pick-six. Abdullah—a devout Muslim who sat out the 2012-13 season to make Hajj, the Islamic pilgrimage to Mecca—shouldn't have been penalized. » 9/30/14 8:46am Today 8:46am

Protesters Balk at Hong Kong Leader's Call to End Demonstrations

Hong Kong's Beijing-approved leader, Leung Chun-ying, has called for an end of the pro-democracy demonstrations being held in the semiautonomous city by tens of thousands of its citizens. He has taken specific aim at Occupy Central With Love and Peace, one of the two major organizing groups, saying, "Occupy Central… » 9/30/14 8:17am Today 8:17am

America's Ugliest Accent: Scranton vs. NOLA; Tallahassee vs. Minneapolis

Welcome to another edition of America's Ugliest Accent, where we as a country gather together to determine which of us in this great nation of disgusting vocal squalor has the least listenable accent. Every day this week, Round One of the Tournament, we'll be presenting two face-offs between cities. You, humble… » 9/30/14 12:00pm 18 minutes ago