Microsoft Shutting Down Silicon Valley Research Lab Amid Layoffs

The company that brought you classics like Windows 3.1 and Windows 95 is making a move that doesn't bode well for future breakthroughs: according to canned employees, its R&D lab in Silicon Valley is closing. » 9/18/14 2:49pm 22 minutes ago

What Causes Atlantic Hurricanes to Curve Away From the U.S.?

For the past week and change, we've watched Hurricane Edouard swirl its way through the central Atlantic. Its track is thousands of miles long at this point, yet it's affected nobody but some ships and some planes and some fish. What causes hurricanes to make such grand curves out in the ocean? » 9/18/14 2:44pm 28 minutes ago

Cops Search for Man Seen Putting Arm Around Missing UVA Student

Police are searching for a man who was seen putting his arm around Hannah Graham—the missing University of Virginia student—on the night of her disappearance. Surveillance footage released this morning shows a different man who appears to be following her as she walks around Charlottesville. That man has come forward… » 9/18/14 2:35pm 37 minutes ago

Philly Hate Crime Suspect Quits His Catholic School Coaching Job

With help from anonymous Twitter users, Philadelphia law enforcement is closing in on the group of young people who beat up a gay couple on the street last Thursday. One of the suspects, an assistant coach at the Archbishop Wood Catholic school, quit his job today. The diocese announced the news, adding that "violence… » 9/18/14 2:13pm 59 minutes ago

Three Years Needed To Clean NYC Bus Terminal's Wretched Bathrooms

The Port Authority of New York and New Jersey recently stated it would take three years to upgrade the bathrooms at its bus terminal, the single worst place on earth. It only took four years for them to build the entire fucking George Washington Bridge. » 9/18/14 1:59pm Today 1:59pm

A Gentleman's Guide To Sex In Prison

When I tell people that I recently finished serving a 10-year prison sentence for armed robbery, mostly in maximum-security facilities, I often feel a question lingering in the air. The moment I sense it, I try to respond to the awkward silence in some offhanded way, though it is hard to be blithe and whimsical when… » 9/18/14 1:32pm Today 1:32pm

Ryan Gosling Wept Over New Baby, Prob Remembering Unrelated Sad Thing

Ryan Gosling, actor who isn't even married to Eva Mendes yet so technically—you know, obviously who knows, but it's just, technically you guys could still date, reportedly wept at the sight of his newborn baby girl. Why? Has Ryan Gosling never seen a baby before? » 9/18/14 1:20pm Today 1:20pm

Guinea's Ebola Health Team Missing, May Have Been Kidnapped and Killed

Guinea health officials responsible for educating the public about Ebola have gone missing, according to reports compiled by the BBC. The officials were apparently pelted with stones by villagers in the Nzerekore region, and Guinea's government now fears they may have been kidnapped and killed. » 9/18/14 12:12pm Today 12:12pm

How to Spend 36 Hours in Central Park

If you're looking for a good time when you visit New York, you can read how to spend 36 Hours (Straight) in Central Park in today's New York Times, or you can just do what I did: spend 36 hours in Central Park over the course of nine years. After all, you got plans to sleep in the park this weekend? Wayward tourists,… » 9/18/14 11:53am Today 11:53am

Tim & Eric's New Show Actually Doesn't Suck

Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim are returning to Adult Swim tonight with a new anthology, Tim & Eric's Bedtime Stories, premiering at 12:15 a.m., and what you should know is: You, like me, can be a totally hip, with-it kind of person and be exhausted with Tim & Eric, with Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! and Tim… » 9/18/14 11:19am Today 11:19am

ISIS Releases New Video of Captured British Journalist John Cantlie

On Thursday, ISIS released a video of captured British journalist John Cantlie. In the video, Cantlie, who was abducted in Syria in November 2012, calmly tells the viewer that the British government has "abandoned" him and promises to explain, over a series of subsequent videos, the "truth" behind ISIS and the ways in… » 9/18/14 10:47am Today 10:47am

Report: "Bitchy" Fashion Week Models Put Cigs in Kendall Jenner's Drink

Teen fashion model and Kim Kardashian sister Kendall Jenner learned some important lessons at New York Fashion Week this year. 1) nepotism is a double-edged sword, and 2) fashion models are hungry and therefore mean! Reportedly, a gaggle of models without famous sisters put cigarettes in Kendall's drink backstage. » 9/18/14 10:19am Today 10:19am

Where Do You Go After Writing Your Ending? A Q&A With John Darnielle

On September 16, John Darnielle—best known as the singer/guitarist and essential constituent of the band the Mountain Goats—released his debut novel, Wolf in White Van. A day later, the National Book Foundation announced it had been nominated to the long list for the 2014 National Book Award for fiction. » 9/18/14 10:12am Today 10:12am

12 Jobs From My Recent Past

I've never been particularly good a having a "traditional" job—a byproduct, perhaps, of a lenient upbringing, attendance at a magnet high school for the arts, my birth as an American, and then a variety of other luck and circumstance that has permitted me to be at times fickle, but more often or at least most simply… » 9/18/14 3:00pm 12 minutes ago