Notorious Deadbeat Dad Jeff Toobin Wants Web Histories Forgotten

So much of editing is matching a writer to a story: Tennis player and super fan David Foster Wallace on Roger Federer. Ex-Wall Street trader Michael Lewis on the financial crisis. And, now, in this week's New Yorker, deadbeat father and alleged ass-play aficionado Jeffrey Toobin on the right to control one's Google… » 9/22/14 3:00pm 11 minutes ago

Mother-Daughter Prankster Team Burn Giant Penis Onto Football Field

If you're going to burn a giant, 100-yard penis onto a football field at your high school, who are you going to ask to be your accomplice? Your cousin? The valedictorian of your class? A landscaping expert? No, asshole, your mom. » 9/22/14 2:52pm 19 minutes ago

What Can We Learn From the New Yorker's Bard College Alumni Letter?

In this week's New Yorker, Alice Gregory puzzles over the future of tiny Bard College, from which (as she discloses in an oddly coy aside) she graduated five years ago. If you want to learn about the college, which is basically a precious hipster Marxist summer camp where 60 to 80 percent of the student body is high… » 9/22/14 2:43pm 28 minutes ago

Hilary Duff "Totally Open" to a Lizzie McGuire Reunion Show

This is what dreams are made of: Hilary Duff is officially down to reprise her best (only) role as everyone's favorite middle school sensation Lizzie McGuire. Duff told the Huffington Post, "My schedule is a little busy right now. But um…why not?" Haha yeah she's super busy but you know, why not. » 9/22/14 2:36pm 34 minutes ago

How to Use a Fake Name on Facebook Without Getting Flagged

Facebook has always had a policy of requiring users to supply their real name on the site. Enforcement has been lax, but there's still a risk of getting caught. Here's how to fly under the radar if you need to. » 9/22/14 2:28pm 42 minutes ago

Satan Hailed With Grape Juice, Big Dildo in Oklahoma Black Mass

It was an epic battle between crucifixes and deified baked goods vs. grape juice and dildos in Oklahoma City on Sunday night—and while it's unclear which side won in the fight over the "black mass", we know for certain that (as always happens when alleged adults engage in such fights) dignity and enlightenment once… » 9/22/14 2:21pm 50 minutes ago

Miss America Was Kicked Out of Her Sorority for Abusive Hazing

On paper, Miss America 2015 Kira Kazantsev reads like a forward-thinking person's dream of what a beauty queen could be. She's a trilingual honors student who's publicly passionate about women's health and down to clown with Jimmy Kimmel; she's got a squeaky-clean image and a squeaky-clean resume. But it's missing one… » 9/22/14 2:02pm Today 2:02pm

Meet The Special People Helping Celebrities Invest In Startups

The New York Times has located a new breed of hustlers trying to convince Hollywood celebrities to make money off startups instead of traditional endorsement deals. It's not even a hard sell, according to Timothy Karunaratne: "I think it's a fair statement to say most people would rather be Mark Zuckerberg than Will… » 9/22/14 1:40pm Today 1:40pm

Viral Hate Campaign Used a Photo of an Afghan Women's Rights Hero

The photo above depicts Malalai Kakar, a pioneering female police officer who aided "victims of domestic violence, rape, and forced marriage" before the Taliban murdered her in 2008. Her photographer was shocked to find conservatives using the image this month in a viral anti-Muslim campaign. » 9/22/14 1:21pm Today 1:21pm

Man in Wheelchair Crowd Surfs During Kanye West Performance

A week after being wrongly accused of berating a disabled fan, Kanye West achieved ultimate redemption last night in Chicago when a man in a wheelchair crowd surfed during his performance at Common's AAHH! Festival. » 9/22/14 1:09pm Today 1:09pm

Rand Paul Is Running for President in the Most Obnoxious Way Possible

Libertarians are having a moment or something, and there is much excitement over the possibility of a presidential run by a bizarrely coiffed amateur ophthalmologist and civil-rights opponent. How could he be more obnoxious? By staking his candidacy on Silicon Valley brogrammers. » 9/22/14 12:56pm Today 12:56pm

#X Is The Little Hashtag That Could (Save Lives)

At this point, it's pretty obvious people who text and drive are the spawn of a very technologically-savvy Satan. It's just bad news, guys, and it doesn't matter if you're talking to your mom, your friend, or your long-lost boyfriend from fifth grade who just might be your soulmate — turn your phone on silent or pull… » 9/22/14 12:00pm Today 12:00pm