Just Undo It: The LeBron James Profile That Nike Killed

This profile of LeBron James was reported and written in 2011 for Port, a new London-based men's magazine, under odd circumstances: Nike paid for the writer's travel expenses and a portion of his fee. The story that came out of the trip was not what Nike had expected—a rep was apparently "furious"—and the magazine,… » 7/10/14 3:35pm 9 minutes ago

Witness Testifies That Friends May Have Taken Dzhokhar Tsarnaev's Weed

Azamat Tazhayakov, friend of younger, dreamier Boston Bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, is currently on trial for obstruction of justice. Tazhayakov is one of three Dzhokhar friends who will each be tried separately on similar charges — and now the equally grievous charge of copping Dzhokar's stash. » 7/10/14 3:26pm 17 minutes ago

Cops Decide Not to Photograph Teen's Erect Penis to Prove He Sexted

After being roundly criticized for the plan, cops and prosecutors in Manassas City, Va. have decided not to take photos of a 17-year-old boy's erect penis to prove he sexted his underage girlfriend. They're not dropping the case against the kid, however. He's still charged with felony counts of possessing and… » 7/10/14 3:15pm 28 minutes ago

Watch Mindy Kaling Keep It Together As She Announces Her Own Emmy Snub

It wouldn't be the Emmys without someone getting snubbed, but at least most Emmy hopefuls get to decide where they'll be when they find out whether they got the nomination. "Fucking Indian woman who has her own fucking network television show" Mindy Kaling co-hosted this year's noms, so she had to remain on stage… » 7/10/14 2:40pm Today 2:40pm

Breitbart.com Is Sure This Adidas Shirt's an Islamo-Mexican Terror Rug

Heard the news? If you only consume the mainstream media's Obamaflecting pulp, probably not: There are Muslims sneaking across the U.S.-Mexico border. The scary kind, who pray. How do we know? Because always-patriotic, never-delusional anti-government militiamen have a picture of their prayer rug. » 7/10/14 2:20pm Today 2:20pm

Battle of the Twitter Teen Mystics: Jaden vs. Willow

Yesterday, after reading Rich's post about Willow Smith and "those systematic French fries the government feeds us," I noticed that, much like her brother Jaden, she too has accepted Smithology as her one and true religion and is fated to spread its teachings across the globe. I then wondered: Is Willow better at… » 7/10/14 2:10pm Today 2:10pm

A Not at All Disturbing Photo of Khloe Kardashian Holding a Machine Gun

Here is a photo I can't stop thinking about: Khloe Kardashian and her boyfriend French Montana on the set of the video for his new song "Don't Panic" wearing diabolical opera masks and holding what appear to be some sort of (fake) machine guns (disclaimer: I know nothing about guns). » 7/10/14 1:31pm Today 1:31pm

Germany Kicks Top CIA Official Out of the Country

Germany announced today that it's asked the top CIA official at the U.S. embassy in Berlin to leave the country. The expulsion comes just days after German officials launched investigations two possible U.S. spies have been investigated in Germany. » 7/10/14 1:22pm Today 1:22pm

This Is Not Whitney Houston

Via Entertainment Weekly, it is America's Next Top Model Cycle 3 first-runner-up-turned-actress Yaya DCcosta as Whitney Houston in Angela Bassett's upcoming biopic for Lifetime (set to air in early 2015). The cover of Houston's 1987 sophomore album, Whitney, is the reference point: » 7/10/14 1:13pm Today 1:13pm

Google Launches $100 M. VC Fund in Europe While Under EU Investigation

The only way Google could be in worse trouble with European regulators right now is if Larry Page signed the order to wiretap Angela Merkel's phone himself. NSA revelations have hurt Google's European contracts and antitrust investigations are multiplying like Gremlins. » 7/10/14 1:10pm Today 1:10pm

DC Uber Driver Kidnaps Passenger, Takes Him On High Speed Police Chase

Uber may have instituted a $1 "Safe Rides Fee" in April, but its background checks remain trivial to get around. Now their lax standards have resulted in another kidnapping. This time, a scofflaw driver in Washington D.C. took a group of out-of-town visitors for a "wild ride." » 7/10/14 12:55pm Today 12:55pm

16-Year-Old's Rape Goes Viral Because Human Beings Are Terrible

The recorded rape of a Houston area teen has gone viral on social media, sparking its own mocking hashtag on Twitter and sending humanity spiraling ever more rapidly toward its inevitable and rapidly approaching self-inflicted demise. » 7/10/14 12:42pm Today 12:42pm