That cute one you've had your eye on in the subway? She/he totally might have chatted you up, if you'd been reading a real book instead of a goddamned Kindle.

"I can no longer hit on a handsome man on a long commute by asking about his book, because I can't see it," eligible Park Slope playwright Lisa Lewis writes in a Complaint Box essay for the New York Times website. "I had one good pickup line, and e-readers ruined it." Consider this fair warning to all of you F train wallflowers hoping to get picked up: Buy a hard copy. If the book is in Amazon's used section, it's usually cheaper than the e-version anyway, shipping included.

What's that? Physical books are bulky? Fantastic, now you're getting in shape, too. You're welcome.

[Photo via Gubatron/Flickr]