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Jonah Hill's name is increasingly becoming synonymous with man-on-man oral sex. On last night's Chelsea Lately, Channing Tatum explained that though he won a bet over the opening weekend gross of 2012's 21 Jump Street that would require Hill to kiss the tip of his dick, he's yet to collect. Again. People will not let him stop talking about this.
He also did so on Monday's Conan, alongside Hill. (The pair were promoting the sequel 22 Jump Street.)
The story became public knowledge via Tatum's recent GQ cover story, which laid it out like this: Tatum and Hill were discussing the opening gross of their upcoming movie while drinking. Tatum predicted an opening weekend of $35 million, and Hill thought that was ridiculously high, so he said he'd kiss the tip of Tatum's dick if it happened. It happened:
On the morning of Monday, March 19, 2012, America—and Jonah Hill—awoke to the news that over the previous weekend the movie version of 21 Jump Street had topped the box office. And it had done so by taking in $36 million. A moment of great happiness for all concerned, though maybe also a little awkwardness for Hill, given what he had said to Tatum a few nights earlier—a promise of unfortunate specificity that went like this:
"I will kiss your tip! I will kiss the tip of your dick through your underwear if we make $35 million."
"I will only say," Hill tells me now, "that Channing and I say a lot of stupid stuff when we drink together."
"I haven't made him do it yet," Tatum tells me. "For obvious reasons. That's a bad bet to lose—it's not too good to win, either. But definitely the shame of it would be enjoyable. It's my trump card, for sure. He tries not to bring it up at all costs. Unless he did something horrible to me, I don't know if I could ever cash it in. It would change our relationship forever."
"It's a lose-lose for both parties, I feel," echoes Hill. "I'd have to clear it with Jenna.… There's all sorts of loopholes that have to be taken into consideration."
And until Jonah Hill actually places his mouth on Channing Tatum's penis, the pair are condemned to discuss their homoerotic-but-still-mad-bro-ish potential moment for eternity. They'll make jokes about "doubling down" and gambling careers ending. Tatum will say weird shit like, "If I had a vagina, then maybe I would have collected on it," as he did to Chelsea Handler (because girls, Lisa—boys kiss girls on the dick). At least they have built-in marketing for whatever future projects they pursue together.
What do you think has been more annoying to talk about on this press tour? The "bromance" stuff, or the penis-kissing bet?
Tatum: Oh definitely the penis-kissing bet. Because that was on me. I dumbly mentioned it and it was obviously done in a joking manner, but everyone was like, "So, did you collect on the bet?" thinking they're witty. And thank you for bringing it up the way you're doing it because I think that you're very smart. Definitely way more smart than most of the people we've been interviewed by about this. But I will definitely be careful from now on. Poor Jonah has been hearing about that bet over and over again.
Well, you both seem to have a good attitude about it. None of your answers to the incessant questions about the bet come off as douchey.
Tatum: Thank you!
Hill: It's just silly and funny. And it's a silly, funny movie. So it's good, I guess, to have silly, funny conversations like that.
Will this still feel "silly, funny" in 20 years time? Or will it just feel good?