A college student who must have just woken up from a pre-birth coma sent a letter to Sub Pop, Nirvana's one-time record label, asking if the band, which broke up following the suicide of its frontman Kurt Cobain, would be so kind as to record a Homecoming Week message for her school.
Identifying herself as Virginia Tech's mascot, the student is apparently running for homecoming queen, and, according to Sub Pop, believes the message from Nirvana would boost her chances of winning the crown.
Referring to Nirvana in the letter as "her," the unnamed coed assures the band that recording the message would be beneficial to all involved, as it offers "great publicity," and would allow Nirvana to be included in a bill that features such illustrious acts as Big N Rich, the Ying Yang Twins, and Slightly Stoopid.
For its part, Nirvana would only need to film a short iPhone video (which are "actually great quality," insists the student) saying something like:
What’s up Virginia Tech? This is Nirvana! Just wanted to wish you guys a Happy Homecoming Week and good luck at the game this Saturday. LETS GO HOKIES!
UPDATE: And here, as promised, is "Nirvana's" message to the "HOAGIES":