But the most exciting part is the epistemological argument: If cow tipping were real, it would be on YouTube.
YouTube, the largest clearinghouse of human stupidity the world has ever known — where you can watch hours of kids taking the cinnamon challenge, teens jumping off rooftops onto trampolines, or the explosive results of fireworks set off indoors — fails to deliver one single actual cow-tipping video. (The one exception is a Russian dashcam video, which shows a semitruck full of cattle overturning — and cows shaking themselves off and walking away.)
Absence of YouTube evidence is evidence of absence! (Or evidence that YouTube is enforcing its animal-cruelty ban?) If YouTube can't see a thing, does it really not exist? Let's find out: The first person to share a genuine cow-tipping video with Gawker will win a marked-up copy of Lena Dunham's book proposal.
[Detail of "Fat Cattle" by James Gillray, via Getty]