GG Allin would shit onstage, but did he ever shred $1.1 million to fuck over his heirs? I don’t think so. So let me tell you about this lady, then.

According to the AFP, an 85-year-old Austrian woman cut up almost a million euros, as well as savings account books, “in an apparent attempt to spite her heirs” before dying. She left the tiny pieces on her deathbed, which is very funny to me personally.

Unfortunately, Friedrich Hammerschmidt, deputy head of Austria’s central bank, says probably the family will get the money anyway, ruining this woman’s final fuck you. He spoke with the Kurier daily:

“If the heirs can only find shreds of money and if the origin of the money is assured, then of course it can all be replaced.”

Giving the money to a charity or making her heirs wear Mardi Gras masks that permanently distort their faces in accordance with each of their specific personality flaws would’ve been a better fuck you, probably, and the charity option would have been better for the world in general, depending, but she tried and, to me—that’s what’s important.

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