In an early contender for the greatest coming out of 2016, Tory MP Crispin Blunt told the House of Commons on Wednesday, “I use poppers. I out myself as a popper user.” It’s moments like these that make being a gay guy with a jackhammering pulse, spotty vision, and brain full of dicks just a little bit easier.
Blunt, who’s gay, was speaking at a hearing for the UK’s proposed Psychoactive Substances Bill, which would ban the production, supply and importation of poppers (among substances), but not individual possession, according to the BBC. Blunt argued against including poppers on the bill that aims to crack down on legal highs. The MPs ultimately voted 309 to 228 to reject the removal of poppers from the bill.
For the uninitiated, poppers (also known as alkyl nitrites) are inhalants used typically during sex. They’ve favored by gay men because of their supposed loosening effects, which can help facilitate anal sex and make it even more pleasurable. They also can make you feel like you were put on the planet for the sole purpose of sucking dick. Adverse side effects include headaches, a chapped nose, and a feeling of, “Oh my god what am I doing with my life?” in the time between coming and the poppers wearing off (each popper high lasts about a minute or two, max). John Waters is an enthusiast with a lifetime supply.
Blunt said that banning the drug would be both “fantastically” and “manifestly” stupid. He warned that doing so would “drive supply underground into the hands of criminals.” Additionally, according to the BBC report:
He later told BBC Radio 4's PM programme that he had not suffered any adverse affects from using the drug and there was no “serious evidence” that it posed such a risk. “I think it was the most powerful argument to make and I didn’t want to be a hypocrite,” he said of his Commons statement.
[Golders Green’s MP Mike Freer] went on to express his “considerable concern” concerning the proposed banning of poppers, and the “complete lack of empirical data” on the risks of inhaling alkyl nitrites. Mr. Freer then went on to quote research by Dr. Timothy Hall, an expert in isopropyl nitrates which was featured in GT in 2015. When asked whether ‘poppers’ were more dangerous than alcohol, Dr. Hall replied: “No, these substances pose little threat to the public safety.”
Mr Freer also refereed to a letter from the Chairman of the Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs, who concluded that alkyl nitrites are “not seen to be capable of having harmful effects sufficient to constitute a societal problem.”
The vote on the final bill hasn’t taken place yet, but if it is voted into law, the ban on its various substances will take effect April 1.