Goldman Sachs Elevator Faker Loses Book Deal

If you were eager to buy a book written by a guy who pretended to work at Goldman Sachs and maintained a popular Twitter account about pretending to ride in an elevator, some of it plagiarized, this will be disappointing: the book isn't happening.

Business Insider breaks the bad news for satire fans everywhere:

A statement from Simon and Shuster given to Business Insider is: "In light of information that has recently come to our attention since acquiring John Lefevre's STRAIGHT TO HELL, Touchstone has decided to cancel its publication of this work."

John LeFevre, the account's apparent operator (pictured above with some cool guns) says we've got him all wrong: it was just satire, which in 2014 is just another term for "shit I made up." It's unclear what this book would have even consisted of, other than 140 character zingers about Maseratis and tips about buying cuff links. It probably would have sold very well.