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Do Not Panic: Golf Retailers Will Be Fine When Tiger Woods Returns

We're sure you have been losing sleep over the plight of golf apparel and equipment retailers — what with Tiger Woods gone from the game, they've struggled to sell dull guys with fat asses the same quantities of golfcrap. But fear not! He 'retired' for the down season in golfcrap sales anyway! His probable return at the US Masters in Augusta next month is perfectly timed to boost sales of sweatervests designed to accentuate mantits! [NYT]

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