On Sunday’s 60 Minutes, viewers were given proof that Dick Cheney does, in fact, have a heart. Granted, the first one he had was a piece of shit: it suffered five heart attacks, started a war, underwent open heart surgery, multiple catheterizations and angioplasties, and had a defibrillator and pump implanted. But his newly donated one seems to be working just fine.
For example, on March 28, 2001, Vice President Cheney wrote a “pending” letter of resignation because he suspected he might at any moment become incapacitated by health problems. This was surely a surprise for those affiliated with the Bush campaign who had vetted Cheney’s health before asking him to run. But Cheney's cardiologist was a big fat liar and told the Bush campaign cardiologist that Cheney “was in good health with normal cardiac function.”
When Gupta asked Cheney to explain the doctor's false claims, Cheney responded, “I’m not responsible for that.” Gupta answered, “But sir, you saw it.” And then Cheney, refusing to address the lie, dug in: “Listen to me, I think the bottom line is: was I up to the task of being vice president? And there's no question. I think based upon the fact that I did it for eight years that they were right.”
Now Cheney, thanks to political lies about his health, is the recipient of a heart transplant at age 71. According to the former Vice President, he wakes up each morning with a smile on his face because he’s “got a new day” he never expected to have.
The whole interview is unsettling, but the highlight is watching Cheney look at pictures of his old heart in the operating room. If you want to get in the Halloween spirit and see the heart of a real monster, here you go:
[Screenshot via CBS News]