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    The Upside Of Costner

    Of the many physiological impressions Kevin Costner left in wet cement at his recent Chinese Theater sidewalk induction ceremony, he omitted arguably his most potent appendage for obvious reasons of public decorum, thereby robbing generations of starstruck tourists the thrill of pawing at the cylindrical divot it would have left in the pavement. And though previous attempts have been made to capture the everyman's manhood through a curtain of pleated chinos, only now can we say that the mission has been fully accomplished. Rejoice: You now know what Kevin Costner looks like sporting a semi-chubby in a crisp white suit.


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