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    Debut Of Digital Variety To Spur Rise In Assistants Struck In The Head WIth Flat-Panel Monitors By Angry Bosses

    Today, Variety.com unveiled Digital Variety, an "online reproduction" of the Daily Variety paper that allows computer-based users to simulate the excitement of "flipping pages," a luxury once reserved for those idling in the waiting areas of studios and agencies. While the new product lacks the one of most crucial features of the physical paper—an ability to be easily rolled into a glossy cudgel suitable for the bludgeoning of an incompetent assistant—DigiVar (Digiriety?) does finally allow those of us toiling in the ghettos of the blogoweb to have online access to the publication's many fine awards season ads, like the one reproduced here, taken out by Paramount publicists desperate to have the hard work that was largely ignored by Academy voters recognized in a wound-salving win at the Flackies.


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