· The Lynwood Hilton: The surrender. The terror cell. The first day. The search. The reprieve. The condition. The collision. The cupcakes. The reversal. The return. The arrival. The reckoning. The Gayor.
· T.R. 1, Isaiah 0
· CAA Death Star heat rays boil their neighbors alive. Don't eat the ice cream! It's a trap!
· A Canadian writer who invented the concept of a man unexpectedly getting a woman pregnant sues the makers of Knocked Up.
· A Moment with Ben: NBC's new rock star definitely meaning to catch the network's new pilots, just as soon as he's done slamming these Jäger Bombs! Yeeeeah!!!
· Jericho fans' salt-roasted voices are heard, and the series gets seven more hour-long gasps of radioactive air.
· Hey Paula! Paula? No seriously—Paula? Does anyone have a hand mirror? She might not be breathing.
· Thursday work distractions: Kyle KY's skywriting extravaganza. The Miracle Mile bomb scare.
· Cuba Gooding Jr.: Hero, chicken lover.
· Rob Lowe: Golfer, goldfinch hater.
· Hostel Part 2 director Eli Roth shows off his veiny brontosaurus meat.
· Brad Pitt and George Clooney are trailed to their Grauman's wet cement ceremony by posse of curiously muscular and well-groomed cocktail activists.
· Connery pashes on Indy 4.
· Lindsay Lohan will cut you—if Vanessa Minnillo doesn't get there first.

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