Which ancient, neurotic pervert got more applause at the Oscars on Sunday night—Woody Allen or God?

Cate Blanchett thanked Allen, who was accused of child molestation (again) by his daughter Dylan Farrow last year, in her acceptance speech for Blue Jasmine, which Allen directed. He received a small round of tepid applause.

Matthew McConaughey thanked God, who separated the light from the darkness, in his acceptance speech for Dallas Buyer's Club, of which God was the ultimate cause. God received an even smaller round of even less enthusiastic applause.

Neither got as much applause as Adele Dazeem.