L.A. Wins "Least Breathable Air" Title

Say what you will about Los Angeles—that it's a hellpit of plastic-enhanced heathens teetering on the brink of seismic annihilation, for example—but give the city this: it has America's worst air.

Besides being and earthquake fault-riddled desert living on borrowed time, Los Angeles can now proudly declare that, as expected, the very air that it breathes is as polluted as the black heart of the amoral entertainment industry power brokers that control the city's civic life. The American Lung Association's annual "State of the Air" report is out today, and here are our nation's five most polluted cities:

#1: Los Angeles-Long Beach, CA

#2: Visalia-Porterville-Hanford, CA

#3: Bakersfield, CA

#4: Fresno-Madera, CA

#5: Sacramento-Roseville, CA

Do you notice a trend? The vile floating particulate matter that chokes the lungs of Angelenos drifts across the entire southern California coast, making the mere act of breathing a chore for unfortunate residents of the damned region. Imagine an innocent child, choking: this is Los Angeles.

Congratulations.

[Photo: AP]