Picture this: You're chilling in the house with Josh and Andre when a scary big-teeth pit bull just walks right in and starts peeing on everything.

Luckily Andre managed to push the dog back with a pillow while you were cowering in the kitchen, but now you're trapped inside while the dog is out on the porch throwing up and humping your pillow and the people across the street are completely ignoring your plight.

Sure, you called the dog police, but they won't be responding for at least the next two hours and you're already late for work.


And why are the people across the street still not doing a damn thing to help. HELP!

And you just swept the porch, too.


[H/T: Guyism]