Gawker
"Oh No They Didn't" is alleging that chef Chris Fischer is Jake Gyllenhaal's boyfriend—Fischer was (perhaps still is?) a sous chef at Babbo. The two were most recently spotted running a race on Martha's Vineyard. That is so clearly gay! (That was sarcastic.) There are two camps of crazy gays these days: the other camp thinks that Jake and actor Austin Nichols were until recently dating. But we're going to go with Chris (even though his people have also been heard defending Chris and Jake's relationship by saying that they've been friends since childhood), because, clearly, Jake has had a thing for chefs for forever.
As we learned the hard way not long back, Jake and Mario Batali are also old family friends. And! In this week's New Yorker, the meandering opening to Tables for Two—or rather, the excuse to bring up the story about Brad Pitt having worked at El Pollo Loco, where he was made to dress up like a chicken—mentions that Jake Gyllenhaal frequents new-ish Midtown Italian restaurant Insieme because "As a teen-ager, [Gyllenhaal] washed dishes for the chef Marco Canora, who was in the midst of his first big-time gig, at Tom Colicchio's Craft." Hmm! So when he wants to visit the restaurant, Gyllenhaal simply calls Canora and comes by with his mother. The original beard! Or maybe he just likes getting free meals.
LET'S PLAY A GAME: FIND JAKE GYLLENHAAL [ONTD]
Insieme: Tables for Two [TNY]
Comments
I was once on a plane that crashed into the Andes. It was thoughts of Jake Gyllenhaal being gay that kept me warm and alive.
That, and I ate a rugby team.
Maybe they were filming a scene for Brokeback Summer Home.
I kept expecting an explanation for why Jake was talking to Jason from Laguna/The Hills in the picture.
Please. Every time I read the "Brad Pitt Was a Giant Chicken" story I feel compelled to send a check to PETA.
One more and they're putting me on the board of directors.
Right now the New York Post is trying to decide between "Short Stack Mountain???" or "Baby Back Mountain???" as their headline on this.
Jake just needs to hang with fugs and this would be a non issue.
Chef: My Salty Chocolate Balls must have rejuvenated him!
Kyle: You've got the best balls in the whole world, Chef.
Chef: You're damn right.
@Rock_Hunter: donnie homo
@the cajun boy: P(r)oof?
So the key question is: is this a fetish for Italian or an Italian fetish?
I look forward to the day when this is as much of a non-issue (a celebrity being/not being gay) as if he were dating a woman of another race. It will probably yield less page views, but more equality for freedom of sexual choice.
Jake and Chris do have that homo tendency to date what could be their fraternal twin brother-thing going on. Also, I hear Jake has a counter-clockwise hair whorl.
Mama mia! You think he like-a to get-a Ledged in his Gyllenhole by a nice-a salami?
@theobviouschild: I think with Jakey G, here, the only "issue" is everyone wanting to claim him as their own.
And I can't blame any of 'em.
But what does this mean for the future of Gyllenspoon? You mean the greatest and most passionate romance of the 21st century could be *gasp* FAKE?
I dunno until I see a picture of Jake actually getting his butt reamed by one of his boy BFFs in a puptent I'm agnostic.
Please god let this be true. And let there be videos.
where's the toothy tile tag? OMG. maybe that toothiness refers to his love of using teeth on delicious food!
also, new blind item re: toothy, which hints at the whole it's-not-austin thing.
I don't think he's gay, but I've got a few friends who'd go bananas if he were.
God, where is the photo taken after the above, which shows Chris throwing Jake up against that wall and shoving his tongue down his throat?
@Patricia2:
He is not gay. His boyfriend is.
c'mon people, they are talking in the middle of the street to one another! they are obviously completely in love.
Hey Gawker you might want to step back and do your fact checking. Was it ONTD, IHJ, or WFT that found that sighting of Jake on the Run? Oh no it was....the scoop was made on Wicked's Wonderful World blog. Yeah check the times and then we'll talk.
He definitely has a limp wrist thing going on there.
Think about it, if YOU had to see your sister's lactating boobs in every trade mag and at the family table, you'd go gay in a heartbeat.
They're faux beaus.
@theobviouschild: i'm going to out-sincerity you here by asking what the hell the issue would be if he was dating a woman of another race. apart from the fact that she would be his beard, that is.
i wonder who's the "top" chef.
Heath Ledger still isn't jealous.
@slinkimalinki: That's why I said it would be a non-issue.
Dunno, the Toothy item just doesn't sound like Jake, too wild. He brings his mother everywhere he goes, for god's sake.
That chefosexual tag gave me the happies. Let's start compiling a list.
i've been waiting to see if anyone can come up with an excellent Fischerspooner comment, because i certainly can't.
Re: Jake and Austin Nichols, it's impossible to decide between, "See God, Jake!" and "Catching is not ringin' a bell."
@fileunder: He could eat them with a Fischerspoon?
Overheard on the set of John from Cincinnati:
"Jake G should get back in the gay."
"Some things I blow and some things I don't blow."
HA I live on the Vineyard and used to date Chris' sister, Jake is a family friend of the Fischers so basically...i find this entire situation hilarious...because neither of them are gay...at all.
Food fan and chronic kitchen helper Jake Gyllenhaal, while not putting his acting career on the back burner, plans to open an organic restaurant with his chef pal (and onetime rumored boyfriend), Chris Fischer, as soon as a space is found. The partners are looking at real estate in Los Angeles.
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