Bus Tour Great Way To Find Out Which 'Apprentice: L.A.' Candidates Are Qualified To Oversee Highrise Construction

If you happened to catch the (underperforming) premiere of Donald Trump's former pet project, The Apprentice, you know you're in store for more of the same—two teams of bickering incompetents with enviable bone structure—but this time with the added twist of some very L.A.-centric challenges. (i.e., Don't be surprised if contestants are soon asked to "think outside the Pinkberry topping case.") In this video (courtesy of Fishbowl LA) some friends don't get very far on their road trip to Ohio before stumbling onto a StarLine double decker sightseeing bus led by candidates Aaron, Stefani, and James, and featuring a brief appearance by Ivanka Trump, who gamely poses for a photograph with a fan. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the very outside-the-Hollywood -tour-box-thinking "Famous Places, Beautiful Faces," featuring James's high-pitched squeals of disbelief following each announcement of an A-list star who has no star on the Walk of Fame. More »

Defamer TrendWatch: Being Too Rich To Perform Parental Duties

Recent dads Donald Trump and Adam Sandler stand proudly at the forefront of a movement promoting a return to traditional domestic roles, in which the father is relied upon to provide for his family by starring in stale reality show franchises and/or one-joke movies based entirely around magic-imbued electronic devices, their wives expected to pose elegantly for visiting In Style photographers, and, somewhere down a long hallway in a nursery room outfitted with the latest in fashionable cribware, an around-the-clock staff tending to their soiled little ones, dusting their fresh bottoms in the finest powdered gold. More »

Donald Gives Melania A Modest Gift

Click to enlarge and seethe. More »

Melania Knauss' Nude Photos, Served With A Side Of Our Self-Loathing

We're figuring that the more filthy souls amongst you are aware of the following, but Gawker would be seriously remiss if we didn't directly present you with the alleged nude pictorial of Donald Trump's latest wife, Melania Knauss. (Also, it's Friday, so we'll post almost anything.) More »

Also, Tina Brown To Speak At Trump University Alumni Association

Hey, did you hear about the biggest residential real estate sale in the history of New York? Donald Trump sold three buildings for $1.8 billion. What have you done today? More »

Gossip Roundup: The Donald And Ivana Terrorize Vegas

· As if Las Vegas weren't garish enough, Donald Trump's new 64-story Trump Hotel and Tower will have some competition from his ex-wife Ivana, whose aptly-named Ivana condos will rise just a smidgen higher at 73 stories. [R&M] More »

Trump School: Please Open Your Textbooks to Chapter 11

You know, the problem with business schools has always been that they teach you how to run a successful business. Thank God someone knows that true business acumen is really about media ubiquity, and not so much that whole making a profit thing. More »

Donald Trump: Lower Manhattan Needs to be Saved

Yesterday we reported on Donald Trump s finances. Per usual, we totally missed the real story. That story being: Trump confirms he is an Ass of the Highest Order (and we love him for it). Also, he sounds somewhat serious* about wanting to rebuild the WTC. Quoth The Donald: More »

Trump: Bankrupt or Not, Donald's More Interesting than Maer

Speaking of sending hate mail about our Radar blather, please feel free to include other suggestions for our Adderall-deprived skulls. In particular, we enjoy missives filled with libel, half-truths, and full-on-lies. (Or perhaps one that is completely true, but requires, uh, reporting.) A good example comes from a tipster who seems to have had enough of Maer's magazine: More »

Trump's Tower: Erectile Dysfunction?

C'mon boys, let's keep this a clean fight. Wash your hands and go to your corners.—MG

On a recent edition of The Apprentice, Donald Trump took a swipe at Mark Cuban and Richard Branson. In a heated boardroom discussion, Trump became agitated when one Apprentice candidate did nothing to defend himself when attacked by one of his fellow Apprentice candidates. Trump then drew a parallel to his own life saying "Branson went after me, I killed him. Cuban, went after me, I killed him."...Reality TV Magazine contacted Cuban to see if he would like to give a response to The Donald's most recent "killing" allegations. Cuban replied (and we quote), "He [Donald Trump] needs to step away from the Cialis. Those 4 hour erections have started to have an impact on his thinking."

"Mark Cuban Responds To Donald Trump s Killing Comments" [Reality TV]

Robert Iler, Meet Your Perfect Mate

Give a girl an inch and she'll take your iPod. The 17-year-old daughter of actress Dianne Wiest (former D.A. on "Law & Order," at right) was arrested yesterday for taking part in some hot girl-on-boy action. Hey, life is random. —MG

Emily Wiest, 17, and two other teenage girls were arrested Friday afternoon for allegedly roughing up a male classmate from the Beekman School and stealing his digital music player, court papers say. Asked for comment, her actress mom said through the door of her Upper West Side apartment, "I don't know what you're talking about," and declined to say anything else. A courthouse source said the Academy Award-winner was acting and had actually spent all day at Manhattan Criminal Court on Saturday awaiting her daughter's arraignment.

Wild Wiest Girl Busted in Attack [New York Post]

Gossip Roundup: Vanessa Haydon, Trump's Little Thug?

· Was Donald Trump, Jr.'s fiancée Vanessa Haydon romantic involvement with a Latin King gang member a youthful folly, or was Vanessa a "total gangster bitch?" And couldn't the Trumps use some street cred? [Page Six] More »

No Dove Love For 'The Apprentice'

Last week, the guttersnipes on The Apprentice were asked to make competing television commercials for some sort of new Dove body wash; it should come as no surprise that the resulting advertisements were spectacularly shitty. Dove, however, is not content with letting their product placement end on a sour note: More »

Donald Trump's Effect On 'Title Inflation'

Aside from winning the award for Our Favoritest Graphic Ever, TheStreet.com does some solid analysis on the career of Donald Trump's newly-captured bride, Melania Knauss and the "title inflation" effect: More »

Because They All Look The Same, Right?

Current Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon (left) is twenty years older than Finance Minister Benjamin Netanyahu (right). More »

The Trump Wedding Reception: Mark Burnett, Death, And Real Estate

Thanks to a reader inexplicably in attendance, we've got an exclusive account of the hardly-publicized, super-secret Trump wedding reception: More »

Gossip Roundup: The Anna Approves Of The Donald

· Vogue's Anna Wintour proclaims the Donald Trump-Melania Knauss wedding extravaganza to be one of the best parties she's ever attended, probably because she managed to enjoy the fete without being doused in red paint. Oh, and to reiterate that which has been reported ad nauseum, the entire affair was spectacularly ostenatious. [NYDN] More »

Trump Wedding: Something Old...

We end Gawker's Day of Nostalgia with the news that Donald Trump's wedding to Marla Maples is coming along as planned, courtesty of AM New York. More »

Donald Trump Fires Fiance's Errant Nipple

Those crazy kids over at the Associated Press really get us, you know? They know you don't want to hear about Iraqi elections or that Abbas dude. They understand that braving the sickening cold outside just to sit under the flourescent lights of your cubicle is depressing enough, especially after a holiday weekend. So, in an act of sheer generousity, the empathetic AP photo staff is making your Tuesday (which, as of right now, is the new Monday) a bit more tolerable with a possible nip slip from our favorite kept woman, Donald Trump's fianc e Melania Knauss. While the image is still in our nip-slip forensics lab for extensive testing, we at Gawker firmly believe in the veracity of Knauss's crooked areola. More »

Trump Cruise: "You're Mired!"

Breaking new ground in pseudo-luxury cross-promotional co-branding for the MBA-set, Donald Trump is teaming up with Carnival Cruise Lines for Trump World Magazine and Expedia's The Apprentice Legend Cruise. Like business catchphrases and watching the sunset on the ocean? Then have we got a cruise for you from September 26-October 4. More »

Gossip Roundup: Trump's Wedding Will Be Ridiculous

· Donald Trump's wedding to Melania Knauss at his Mar-a-Lago estate promises to be every bit as bombastic as we'd expect. Foodie god Jean-George Vongerichten will be catering free of charge in a specially-built ballroom, but that's not enough to lure ex-wives Ivana Trump and Marla Maples to the ceremony. [Page Six] More »

The Trump Offspring: Not Total Freaks

In a suprisingly endearing profile of the Trump children—Donald Jr., Ivanka, and Eric—New York's Jonathan Van Meter meets the younger Don, who's currently working his way up his old man's ladder: More »

Donald Trump Fires Himself

There's something gleefully ironic in seeing a bajillionaire—one who professes to be the ultimate businessman and even has an ego-tripping reality show revolving around that very notion—file for bankruptcy. Not that we're happy Donald Trump's casinos filed those nasty Chapter 11 papers (again) yesterday for his failed Atlantic City ventures. After all, losing money in that arena just means we'll be inevitably subjected to a profit-inducing increase of his televised, bombastic spittle. Nobody wins, people. More »