By Choire, 6:04 PM on Thu Jun 7 2007, 10,173 views (Edit, to draft, un-top, Slurp)

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WE HEAR... that tomorrow's New York Post will report that Paris Hilton is throwing a big old house party tonight to celebrate her "freedom." Or at least her freedom to stay home for 40 days and contemplate her new jewelry. It's gonna be Biblical, yo! Off the hook—but not off the bracelet! Word is that the parties will surely continue on each night, blurring into one long continuous freakshow for 40 days and 40 nights. Can you build an ark out of crack and pills?