Gawker

We've been hoodiewinked.

What a bitch.

That's the flower talking.

Okay, who had December 14th in their office pools? Anyone?

And when does this "breaking" news become broken?

I have lost all my faith in completely fabricated, sort of forced, and downright creepy love.

Fuck her, Patrick.
Go gay.
Actually ...
We're at quota, so ...
Well, ....
Sorry.

@Koala325:
PATRICK: "I wuv oo soooooo much!"
CAMILLE: "Talk to the flower."

This is why you should never make a website about a woman before the third date.

That's because she wants a man, not a boy. He should have gone 'down under'.

Is anyone acually surprised by this outcome?

She's left him for Jakob Lodwick.

I'm not sure love is ever symmetrical, Patrick. Love her as you choose to love her--how she loves you back is the gift of your love reflecting back onto you. Be well. Go with God.

Probably because he burned her house down so she'd sleep over.

Apparently she wasn't the girl of his lucid dreams.

@CodePink: The love we take is equal to the love we make up in the first place.

If creepy subway/internet stalking doesn't work, what will? Oh, roofies.

@grandmoffbastard: Ha ha! Great one.

@LolCait: Is your name Gene? Gene Yuss?

WAIT!!!!

How does Josh know this????

Is Camille the "lady" Josh will meet in London in the new year, to start a new life with?

Dude.

@Cesare_the_Somnambulist: Josh, just say it isn't Maggie or Sheila!

the only paradise is paradise made up, shamelessly self promoted, and lost. tuning up my violin which only plays sad songs.

Paging Jakob Lodwick, Blackbook, College Humor, Vimeo, Good Morning America and Gothamist!

I hope he bought the Extended Warranty.

She's doing this to get out of Christmas! Which means... she's actually a dude.

@Cesare_the_Somnambulist: Worse. It's Conbon.

I'd make a comment, but at the rate I'm going, someone from the Flower Girl Antidefamation League will rush to chastise me for my lack of sensitivity. :(

julia allison is newly single patrick. boy, wouldn't that be a love triangle made in interweb hell?!

Some other guy set up a website about her that's aggressive and kind of mean, goes offline every few days for no apparent reason, but clearly took a lot of money to put together. She's dating him now.

@grandmoffbastard: British food sucks.

is it because they could never have an actual, in-person conversation but everytime they parted she would find illustrated notes in her pockets not only telling her how she feels but about how maybe they should have done Indian instead of Thai that night and maybe next time not call him "a fucking mime" everytime they "fight" in which their fighting consists of her waving her hands in frustration at his silence and him only responding with blushes, shrugs and downturned eyes?

@the cajun boy: By the by, I caught 5 seconds of JA's ex Dave Zinczenko (sp?) on The Today Show this morning, and holy shit, it seems as if someone's gaydar needs some serious retuning.

@Conbon: Who wants a banger in the mouth?

@TedSez: Up to your standards, which are the best.

@grandmoffbastard: Hold the mash. If you know what's good for you, HOLD. THE. MASH.

@grandmoffbastard: I'll take some haggis in the rear if you're offering!

@grandmoffbastard: This site has devolved into nothing but spotted dick jokes.

@Furious_George: i have to say that despite seeming somewhat effete, i've heard that dzinc is all about poon.

@Pope John Peeps II: You've convinced me!

@Conbon: Best not to speak ill of Balk now that he's gone.

@the supergoddess: And I didn't even have to draw you a picture.

@Cesare_the_Somnambulist: Thanks! Just (trying not to be) doing my job.

She's been a little antsy ever since he asked what she'd let him do to her "flower in the back left."