gold star motel, commenters, sometimes choire changes things to be wrong...

Crumple Face Cry

motel This week was a banner week for excellence in commenting. In addition to the commenters listed below, we'd like to extend a special honorary group gold star to everyone who commented on that 'singlefiers' post, except Thomas Pynchon, who can go eat the four week old lite cottage cheese from a single lady's fridge.

Re: Naomi Watts Parturates At Last

Hortense:
"Perhaps this is why Corey Haim is pointing his finger at all of us today. And also why Corey Feldman looks so contemplative."

Re: Posh Spice Loves Attention

Oovy:
"How about, 'Like a moth to a spotlight, she was drawn to the spotlight, because she is a moth. Or like one.'"

Re: Car-Chasing Lindsay Busted With Pants Full of Cocaine

DonPardoCalrissian:
"Lindsay Lohan is my generation's Paris Hilton."

Re: Beyonce's Florida Faceplant Is Looking So Crazy Right Now

Ellagood:
"finally gravity catches up with her. i mean she wears at least, what, 35 lbs. of water buffalo weave, right?"

Re: Claire Danes' Nipple Tops Mary Louise Parker's Rump

Lolcait:
"I challenge them to an act off. Claire 'does crumple-face cry', Mary Louise does 'drink from a big gulp'. And Mary Louise will win, because she's fantastic. And Claire will show up to Pygmalion rehearsal with teeth missing and a black eye and all the Roundabout queens will hiss 'Oohhh, she's so method...'"

Re: Julia Allison Displays Her Range

Grandmoffbastard:
"It's almost like she's really spelling!"

4:05 PM on Fri Jul 27 2007
By Emily Gould
4,551 views
25 comments

Comments

lululemming at 04:15 PM on 07/27/07
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"Eat the lite cottage cheese from a single lady's fridge." Jesus. If ever I wished I was the overly-literal type....
Pope John Peeps II at 04:18 PM on 07/27/07
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Thomas Pynchon was right on on count, though! Singlefier for men:

- Emily Gould desktop background.
HowDareThey at 04:19 PM on 07/27/07
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"Cottage cheese"? "Fridge"?

"Leftover taco", consider your euphemism crown USURPED.

HO HO! HA HA!
LolCait at 04:21 PM on 07/27/07
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I'm happy for Oovy. That comment was beautiful.
josh speed at 04:21 PM on 07/27/07
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congratulations, kids! now go outside and let the sun and wind blow some of that office stink off you. have a great weekend...
Clarence Rosario at 04:23 PM on 07/27/07
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That's like a commenter All Star Team. But Karen's in front of a Congressional Subcommittee, taking the 5th about the use of controlled substances among the commenter community.
Diglett at 04:26 PM on 07/27/07
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@LolCait: Aw, thx!
KarenUhOh at 04:27 PM on 07/27/07
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These were uniformly great from the uniformly great.

Jeez, Cait, take a week off, willya?
PimpMyCouch at 04:29 PM on 07/27/07
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@lululemming: Oh, I just got that! Eeeeeeeew!!!
Congrats to all!
ascot-revival at 04:30 PM on 07/27/07
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Reading all 5 gold star comments section at once is like staring into the sun. Because it is a sun. Or like one. I'm just confused/blinded by the brilliance of it all.
ascot-revival at 04:32 PM on 07/27/07
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@ascot-revival: That first sentence really didn't make much sense. On account of still being blinded/confused, of course.
TedSez at 04:34 PM on 07/27/07
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Good job, commenters. But let's also thank our Jewish-ish bloggers for amassing their contractually obligated 12 daily items. A lot is forgiven if you're actually funny!
sexbot at 04:42 PM on 07/27/07
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@LolCait: I second that COMPLETELY!
LolCait at 04:46 PM on 07/27/07
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Also, let's give Mathnet some love. She's punderful.
bimbassa at 04:48 PM on 07/27/07
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@lululemming:

So THAT'S what they're calling it these days?
moff at 04:51 PM on 07/27/07
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@LolCait: True!

Wow, between this and the repairman showing up to fix the window a few minutes ago after four no-shows, this is hands down the best hour of the year for me.
sexbot at 04:51 PM on 07/27/07
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@LolCait: Let's all have sex!
LolCait at 04:53 PM on 07/27/07
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@sexbot: Splendid idea. I'll meet you in the Gawker bedroom, which is full of teddy bears and cottage cheese.
LolCait at 04:57 PM on 07/27/07
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Okay, I'm Auf! Love y'all. Have great weekends.
NobodyLikesMe at 05:22 PM on 07/27/07
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@LolCait: I agree. That one made me spit diet coke out my nose.
Colonel Mustard at 05:57 PM on 07/27/07
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I'm still laughing at DonPardo's comment, and I'm not even sure I get it.
mathnet at 06:58 PM on 07/27/07
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@grandmoffbastard: If that was for me (via sweet LOLCait), then thank you. And if not, then thank you.
shesaidwhat at 10:23 PM on 07/27/07
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Oovy's post was hilarious but I'm sorry that MisterHippity's Shakespearean homage to Posh was overlooked.
MisterHippity at 12:09 AM on 07/28/07
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@shesaidwhat: Aw, thanks. Good to know somebody appreciated that.

Next time, I'll have to try something by Chekhov -- you know, like "Aye, captain, shields at 80 percent."
shesaidwhat at 07:33 PM on 07/28/07
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@MisterHippity: more people would appreciate that one but, being culturally illiterate, I had to have someone explain it to me. Oh well. "What a piece of work is Posh!" still makes me giggle.