• 'Member that nasty comment we reported Gwyneth making to a Portuguese newspaper yesterday, about how the Brits are more "civilized and intelligent" than we are? Today, Mrs. Chris Martin defuses our suspicion that she might be a snotty bitch by pointing out that those quotes were taken from a press conference she conducted in Spanish. Oh, you know what, wait — still snotty. [Defamer]
  
• Against all odds, Eddie Murphy and Scary Spice won't exactly be living happily ever after: he's moved on to Babyface's ex and is asking Scary for a paternity test as soon as the kid she's pregs with is born. ClassAY! [R&M]
  
• Will Smith's Fresh Prince castmate Alfonso Ribiero still teases Smith about Wild Wild West, which actually is more embarrassing than being forever known as an Oreo stereotype with a signature goofy dance. [NYMag]
  
• Lesbian and overdose subplots notwithstanding*, Rachel Bilson and Adam Brody's relationship has finally been cancelled.[MollyGood]
  
• Reichen Lehmkuhl and Lance Bass have ended their gay, gay, homosexual love affair, prompting us to hope that this is the last time we'll have to type 'Reichen Lehmkuhl.' [USA Today]
  
• Project Runway's glam quasivillain Laura Bennett gave birth to a boy named Finn, who she will presumably "throw on the pile with the other ones." [People]

  * okay, not really. (That we know of.)

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