[Jessica and Ashlee Simpson] will reap the dismal crops they are sowing. Their breasts will sag and their faces will wither and they will be left with nothing but a hollow shell.

Discommoded preacher Reverend Bob Harrington, formerly known as the "Chaplain of Bourbon Street," voicing his displeasure with the Simpson sisters' slatternly ways. Reverend Bob ministered to needy New Orleans lowlifes during the 1960s and 1970s, then left the God biz to become a motivational speaker; he only returned to the Lord in 1995. Right when Jessica Simpson was recording her minor-label debut album! Coincidence? Only the Simpsons' sagging breasts can tell us for sure. We think the hollow shell part came to pass a long time ago, though.

Reverend slams Simpsons: "Their breasts will sag and their faces will wither" [NW]