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    Lil' Kim's 25th Hour

    kimkiss.jpgOn Monday, Rapper Lil' Kim will begin serving her year-long prison stint for lying under oath during a case involving gunfire exchanged between her associates and that of rival hip-hopista Foxy Brown. How, we wonder, will Kim spend her last days as a free woman?

    • Playing with her coochie, one last time, when she's up in the tub.
    • Rolling around in a pile of the Notorious B.I.G.'s fur coats.
    • Attending fittings for her Marc Jacobs prison jumpsuit.
    • Enjoying a final breast-jiggle from Diana Ross.
    • Looking up the word "perjury" in order to understand what the hell happened.
    • Upping her body's silicon content, so that she might keep herself amused by bouncing off the prison walls.
    • Deciding on a single hair color to sport for the next year.
    • Shoving as many Vuitton items as possible into her anal cavity.
    • Familiarizing herself with The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas.
    • Visiting Judith Miller.


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