Gawker
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the rich
The Hamptons: Still Sucking
Everybody already knows that the Hamptons is the universe's vortex of suck, but here's another reason why: Restaurant/club owners who, as a method of crowd control, roll up the awning sheltering the crowd outside waiting for tables during a downpour.
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Comment by ndhapple: Margaritas in a mason jar would get you laughed out of Austin. Seriously. On another note, why does Mexican/TexMex suck once... 14 Responses | Other threads
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twitterati
Martha Stewart Shaken: Truck Crash Ruins Perfect Lawn
David Gregory was recognized by a confused fan; a Wall Street Journal editor was flummoxed by Twitter and Martha Stewart was rattled by an accident. The Twitterati were flustered. More »
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By Ryan TateComment by cheap_sunglasses: The Marthacave does not accept deliveries! Use the service entrance, people... 1 Responses | Other threads
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feuds
Martha Stewart Foists Grotesque Cupcakes on Beleaguered Nation
Why must Martha Stewart make a mockery of the US diabetes crisis? Our nemesis has written a new book about, you guessed it, cupcakes. Even worse, her henchpeople have emailed, to us, horrifying photographs of the bizarre comestibles Martha's treatise has inspired. This, America, is why you're fat: More »
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Comment by Smitros: Why is there such a thing for cupcakes, anyway? It seems like another sign of collective infantilization. 9 Responses | Other threads
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Bernie Madoff
Bernie Madoff: hired Martha Stewart-endorsed "mitigation specialist" to help him reduce his prison sentence. Luxuries!
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twitterati
The Power Goes Out on the Twitterati
Picture Martha Stewart sitting in the dark, unable to get anything accomplished. It's like the perfect metaphor for how Twitter fails to illuminate the lives of media people! More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by allyzay: there is literally nothing more horrible on the entire internet, and i'm including the entire internet, even cumonherface.com and danny... 5 Responses | Other threads
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twitterati
The Twitterati Apologize for Taking Steroids Offshore
New York has a fancy matrix graphic in which it pretends to identify which Twitterers are insipid or insightful. Oh, New York: Even Twitter's insights are insipid. Today's banalities: More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by The Boulevard of Broken Queens: OK regarding the previous mr T post FOR WHICH THERE IS NO COMMENTS SECTION? "Mr. T -- the only living person... more » | Other threads
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Media Crack
All the Suckers in the World Can't Save Newspapers
In your bitter Monday media column: Newspaper circulation predictably declines, Martha Stewart is predictably scared of us, old people predictably get conned by media hustlers, and Portfolio's unpredictable burn rate: More »
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Comment by meg9: Why would anyone even want to buy a newspaper? There isn't any time to read it, it's a huge floppy... 1 Responses | Other threads
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lawsuits
Martha Stewart's Company Charged With Firing Employee for Getting Hurt
A former advertising director at Body + Soul is accusing parent company Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia of firing her because she broke her spine and went on temporary disability. That's cold, even for Martha. More »
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Comment by bayktdin: "It may look like a rolling pin but in jail they call it a boyfriend" 1 Responses | Other threads
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martha stewart
Boss Martha Fears the Spread of Googley Perks
Three New York City Googlers went on Martha Stewart to show off a scallops recipe today. How fun! But Martha was far more interested in their employer's lavish perks. More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by RubyCeto: I'd much rather run around and do my own errands, if it gets me an hour earlier out of googleland... 1 Responses | Other threads
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feuds
Martha Stewart Will Use Housewarming Gifts to Make You Feel Like a Total Loser
Martha Stewart, our arch-nemesis, has a few ideas about how to save some money during this recession: buy fewer trees, but more glitter kits. She also demands that you knit her a scarf! More »
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Comment by saythatscool: I want to be bound to a post while Martha drips hot wax from her homemade candle on my inner... 16 Responses | Other threads
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Oh Martha
Martha Loses Chow, Prepares Chow
Oh no! Martha Stewart's new chow puppy, Genghis Khan, died in a tragic fire at her breeder's boarding facility. She was so upset that she told Twitter all about it. So how did she cope?
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By Owen ThomasComment by Nesbiteme: Who the f-ck uses propane for anything these days except to barbeque? Reduced reliance on propane, as a fuel source,... 11 Responses | Other threads
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videuhoh
Martha Stewart, Kathie Lee Cannot Tell Black People Apart
Martha Stewart is mystified by "Notorious B.I.G.," and believes all black people know each other. Kathie Lee Gifford thinks Hoda Kotb was born in Africa. Welcome to post-racial American television! More »
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Comment by meanteeth: Isn't Hoda Kotb of Egyptian descent? Doesn't that make her, ahem, African American? 4 Responses | Other threads
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Media Crack
'Community Journo' Is the New 'Broke Ass Reporter'
In your deadly Tuesday media column: Arena is dead, Steven Brill is back to save journalism (with Emily???), the Washington Post tries to cut pay creatively, and our Martha Stewart feud continues: More »
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Comment by Urbania: "Broadening The Editorial Focus" could probably use an editor's eye. We people who see sharpen our focus, broaden views. 7 Responses | Other threads
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twitterati
The Twitterati Take a Snow Day
What's in Ruth Reichl's freezer? What disappoints Martha Stewart? Which New York wantrepreneur is about to get a snowball to the face? And why is a CNN reporter freaking out? Twitter has all the answers: More »
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By Owen ThomasComment by Brawndo: I don't understand why you keep taking famous people's names on twitter as fact of their presence. That is not... 2 Responses | Other threads
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god
God Hates Martha Stewart's Cutesy Drug Show
Martha Stewart's show today was all about pot! Pot pot pot! Jimmy Fallon was there, and he talked about pot! But right in the middle of the winky-drug jokes GOD INTERVENED. More »
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By PareeneComment by The Boulevard of Broken Queens: BECAUSE NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION (or the spanish infanta) 5 Responses | Other threads
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martha stewart
Ludacris Sets Martha Stewart's Rapper Relations Back 20 Years
Snoop Dogg's historic appearance last year on Martha was thought to finally shatter the barrier between hip-hop icons and potato-mashing domestic heroism. Alas, as Ludacris discovered today, that was not change we can believe in. More » -
martha stewart
Martha's Recession-Busting Tips Include Laying Off 10% of Your Housekeeping Workforce
Martha Stewart offered recession-time grocery shopping tips today, demonstrating how even small changes to one's routine—say, laying off a couple gardeners or only consuming local foie gras—can have a huge effect on the bottom line. More » -
feuds
Martha Stewart Impugns Our Integrity!
Inside-trading homemaker and suppressor of differently-colored pens Martha Stewart has implied—via an autograph to a radio show intern—that our intrepid reporting is not to be believed. Outrageous! Why can't Martha Stewart squash the beef?
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Comment by saythatscool: My loins still swell for this icy woman anyway. It's like after jail she went from being a domestic, maternal... 12 Responses | Other threads
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rumormonger
Editor of Martha Stewart Living Laid Off?
A tipster (unconfirmed) tells us that Michael Boodro, who was hired two years ago yesterday as editor of Martha Stewart Living, has been let go and replaced by Gael Towey. More »
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Comment by uninspired: It's apparently because his shirt violated the office design code. 3 Responses | Other threads
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feuds
Martha Stewart's Favorite Florist is a Wacko White Rapper!
Martha Stewart recently had one of her favoritest florists, Peter Seprish, on her show to discuss flower arranging. You associate with shady characters, Martha! Peter Seprish, a.k.a. Peter Party, is an awful white rapper. More » -
short ends
Today On Martha: Puppy Yoga
· So Martha's pissed at Gawker, but as far as we know she still loves Defamer and wants us on her show just as soon as her schedule allows. Meanwhile: Puppy Beagle Yoga! ZOMG! More » -
feuds
Martha Stewart Can't Stop Talking About Our Post on Her Crazy Offices!
Yesterday a brave Martha Stewart Living employee brought the company's prison-like office decor to our attention. (No personal photos!) And now, hilariously, Martha is so upset about this that she's talking and talking about it! More »
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Comment by Pope John Peeps II: Does this mean that fabulous sparkle-harpies Rachel Marsden and Abbe Diaz are going to leap to her defense too? 6 Responses | Other threads
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office space
Martha Stewart Surprisingly Anal About New Offices
A tipster at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia tells us Martha and Co. have a few new rules for staffers in the new offices. Bring nothing! Visual proof included below: More »
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Comment by Rozelle’s Bagman: The Papermate, which is probably the worst pen ever, is approved. And what's up with Brown ink? 8 Responses | Other threads
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recessionomics
The Changing Face of Disgrace
What do the instant comebacks of Martha Stewart, Henry Blodget, and Eliot Spitzer tell us? There's no longer anything to be ashamed of in failure. And that's cheery news for anyone who's been laid off.
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By Owen ThomasComment by Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith: You know, I cannot dislike Stewart. She was castigated publicly in a way that her male counterparts rarely are, and... 2 Responses | Other threads
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animals
Martha Displeased With Sarah Palin's Turkey Massacre
So the other day, Alaska Senator Sarah Palin staged her traditional "pardoning a turkey" photo-op standing directly in front of a man engaged in slaughtering turkeys, because, hey, a team of mavericks won't always agree on where to hold the easiest photo-op of any politician's career. Maybe she can stage the ribbon-cutting of an orphanage at an abortion clinic next time? (Haha as if Alaska had any of those.) Then, because life isn't bizarre enough these days, shouty MSNBC political pundit Keith Olbermann discussed the issue with daytime TV's soft-spoken criminal mastermind Martha Stewart. Martha was not happy. "That was an especially gruesome scene back there," she says. More »
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By PareeneComment by JinxyMcDeath: Agreed - Sarah Palin pardoning a turkey while gleefully standing in front of some bizarre guillotine while turkeys are beheaded...was... 6 Responses | Other threads
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geek love
Bill Gates in Sweden for dirty old man Simonyi's wedding
Microsoft billionaire Charles Simonyi sure likes to live large. He's a space tourist! He dates Martha Stewart! No wait, 60-year-old Simonyi is now marrying 28-year-old Swedish socialite Lisa Persdotter! Let me guess: You don't want a photo of him. You want a photo of her. Here you go... More »
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By Paul BoutinComment by giddieup: 5 letters comes to mind..... skank 3 Responses | Other threads
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short ends
Christmas Centerpiece-Making With Stewart And Colbert
· She may not have the palpable sexual chemistry with Stephen Colbert that she enjoys with Jay Leno or Snoop Dogg, but we could still really kick back all day to watch these two make gilded mistletoe orbs or whatever the hell it is they're up to. More » -
holiday blunt paper stenciling
Snoop Dogg On 'Martha': A Gizzle Thizzle
We're not going to spill any digital ink describing Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg as unlikely compadres. After all, if you can't see how these two herb-aficionado ex-cons fit snuggly into the same gangsta pod—both enjoying nothing more than kicking back after a long day of baking and wreath-construction with a blunt the size of a corncob and getting fucked up for real in this bitch—then you probably don't deserve to be here. On today's Martha, Snoop popped by. Martha introduced him by reading aloud her many correspondences from the hip-hop titan: More » -
short ends
Jay Leno Masturbates A Rolling Pin To Seduce Martha Stewart
· Yes, that's essentially what happened last night—and if only that were the grossest moment. Enjoy! [Thanks to BestWeekEver.tv for the montage.] More » -
election day
Everybody Needs a Drink Right About Now!
MSNBC's lovable Rachel Maddow is a "hobbyist bartender," as she explained to Martha Stewart, who eyed the cocktail Maddow prepared for her a little too eagerly. (We'll be reporting the election returns live from dive bar Milano's later this evening.)
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By SheilaComment by Truculent: I offered to mix Sarah a Oilman's Special -- hard liquor straight stirred with my dick. Drill baby... 8 Responses | Other threads
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martha stewart
Martha Stewart Does Not Offer Job Security
Martha Stewart, a lady who made billions of dollars talking about stuff for your house and dinner parties and things like that and also went to jail once, is already feuding with her company's new co-CEO, Wendy Harris Millard. Recall that, just this past summer, Stewart's company pushed out Susan Lyne, the former CEO. Now even Millard (Lyne's replacement) herself acknowledges there's been "healthy debate," which means the shit must have been too bad to even try to deny. The "differences" are attributed to different "personalities." For example, Martha Stewart's personality is that of a tyrant. [NYP via Cityfile]
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Comment by Trixie from Toronto: My love for Martha Stewart knows no bounds. I wish she'd have Elisabeth Hasselbeck on and icily destroy her. 8 Responses | Other threads
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martha stewart
It's a Bad Thing: Buried deep into HuffPo founder Arianna Huffington's blog entry about last night's debate is the response everyone wants, that of domestic doyenne Martha Stewart. "The home-spun homilies [Sarah Palin uses] have to go," Stewart sniffed to Huffington. "And, oh my god, words do have ending consonants." [HuffPo] -
charles simonyi
Martha Stewart's Microsoft-billionaire ex-boyfriend to go back into space
Charles Simonyi, the Microsoft billionaire who paid $25 million for a 13-day stay on the International Space Station in April 2007, plans to return on another Russian rocket in 2009, says Virginia-based Space Adventures, which didn't say how much he was spending this time. Simonyi, who made his money helping Microsoft develop Excel as well as word, had been dating Martha Stewart for 15 years before they broke up in February; he's now engaged to Lisa Persdotter, a 28-year-old Swede, according to reports. Is she more tolerant of his rocketing career?
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Comment by michaellamb: nope, lisa will do risque sexy times in bed b/c she isn't indepenently wealthy and doesn't want to lose her... more » | Other threads
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By Ryan TateComment by lobstr: I was up by the Dakota when I was in the city last month and there is this supreme douchebag... 5 Responses | Other threads
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alexis stewart
Martha Stewart Gets Snark From Insane Daughter
Are there any outlets left NOT trying to be ironic and meta? Because even Martha Stewart, the icy queen of sincere homemaking, is launching a parody of herself. The show, "Whatever, Martha!", will be run by Stewart's daughter Alexis who, judging from a fresh New York profile, is still acting as self-consciously over the top as she was three years ago, when she first got her satellite radio show. She hates on a paraplegic! She has casual sex, sometimes even with women! She bought a handgun in preparation for a U.S. invasion! And now she's going to run a show where she'll make fun of her mom's old shows on a show co-produced by that same company. In the process we'll all get an uncomfortable look behind the scenes in the Stewart family, which involves learning the following: More »
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By Ryan TateComment by Aaron Altman: I do love that MST3K was the inspiration for this crazy show, which surely will be better than any of... 13 Responses | Other threads
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bloggers on tv
"The Idea Of Bloggers In Their Pajamas In Basements Has Just Sort Of Collapsed"
So says Politico blogger Ben Smith, who wore a suit to appear — looking nothing like his illustration, albeit kind of cute! — on Martha this morning.* The lifestyle queen invited political bloggers to her show today because she thinks it's scary the nation might elect a president who doesn't know how to read them and also probably because the more topical subject of complex financial shenanigans is not her specialty, oh wait just kidding. Personally I have always thought not being addicted to the internet was John McCain's most attractive quality since being tortured, but it raises a good point: I do not want presiding over this perilous economy one of those people who asks "You actually get paid to do that?" More »
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By MoeComment by BK_KT: Herrooowwww Ben Smith, let's cuddle and talk about how much we hate Palin, k? 5 Responses | Other threads
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martha stewart
Martha Stewart Lays Off 25
"Morale, which took a tumble when CEO Susan Lyne left last month, has slumped even further, according to one insider." [Post] -
mysteries
Um, Guys? Where's Martha Stewart's Arm?
Hey, um, Martha Stewart—craftswoman, entrepreneur, be-vaginaed insider trading escape goat—is currently appearing in Wal-Mart ads and her left arm is missing. Judging by the above screenshot at least. Where did it go? Lost in a prison shanking? Severed while trying to make her famous Whirling Dervish Spinning Saw Blade centerpiece? Gnawed off by the Montauk Monster?? The world may never know. [Something Awful] Click thru to analyze a larger image. UPDATE: We have video of the commercial (after the jump) and Ms. Stewart's arm is indeed there. This is just trickery! Find the phantom limb at the 13 second mark (timestamp runs backward). More »
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Comment by octothorpopus: Cool, I didn't think my tip would make it. Thanks for the explanation! more » | Other threads
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critical stalker
Martha Stewart
Taking a walk down Spring Street a few minutes ago to buy seltzer and roach traps for my apartment, I spotted Martha Stewart! I'm pretty sure it was her, anyway: girlfriend was coming out of that lampshade store that no one goes to (update: wearing black capris and a crisp black shirt) with a couple of assistants, loading boxes into a black SUV. Somebody please get me the name of her dermatologist for future reference—thnx. -
short ends
Whoopsi Goldberg Still Getting The Hang Of Correctly Identifying International Pop Sensations
· Do you mean to tell us that between the combined casts of The View and The Love Guru, no one has the balls or heart to break the news to the Whoopsters that Timberland is theproduceroutdoorswear company, Timberlake is the singer, and Timbaland is the producer? Ugh, never mind. We can't keep those three straight either. [The View] More »
martha stewart
New York, 5:38 AM
Fri Jul 10
44 posts in the last 24 hours
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