Go on, indulge yourself for a second: HOLY SHIT BRITNEY SPEARS POOPED OUT A BABY BOY!!!! Mother Nature has turned her back on the human race!

Now the facts: The National Enquirer reports that the poptard gave birth by Cesarean; the baby was born at 2 AM today, just narrowly avoiding a cursed birthday (as if being her kid weren't curse enough). Sources report that Britney was pregnant with her third child as of 9 AM this morning.

Britney Gives Birth: It's a Boy! [National Enquirer]

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