In our correspondence this week, we received a complicated pharmaceutical scam, a straight up fan letter, someone chatting all about Paula Deen, and someone writing about spinach dip (those last two letters are surprisingly unrelated). Enjoy our amusing epistolary exchanges, included below.
Because this email is approximately 200 words and it was presumably all painstakingly typed on a phone, I'm more inclined to give it slightly extra weight. Is that unfair? I think so!
SUBJECT: Paula deen coverage
BODY: I think it's important what you left out of your posts about Paula deens deposition in which she admits to using the "N" word in the past.
You make it sound like she causally and frequently used the word, but you cut off the transcription at the point where she states that she once used it in response to a gun being pointed at her head while working at a bank.
I am not a Paula deen apologist , I just think after reading a CNN article (sad when their article is more accurate) its clear that you cherry picked pieces of her deposition and left important context out. This results in spin. The same kind of spin you decry when FOX engages in.
She goes on to say
"But that's just not a word that we use as time has gone on," she said.
"Things have changed since the '60s in the South. And my children and my brother object to that word being used in any cruel or mean behavior."
I think it's important that you are fair and don't just create posts to fit a nice, neat, narrative of oh, look at the crazy southern racist butter lovin lady
Sent from my iPhone
Look at all the math! Math that becomes money! Seems like a sure thing! Thrilled to be in business with you, scam lady.
SUBJECT: Re: Please work with me. Supply.
BODY: Dear sir,
This is Ms. Victoria Wood, a Secretary to the procurement manager of GSK Pharmaceutical Company.
There is a business I will want us to do together. I want you to participate in supply of medicinal herb. There is this medicinal herb our company used for production of HIV antiviral drugs and is scarce and rare to find. There are two main suppliers of the herbs from Spain and UK to our company (GSK). They supplied 50gms of Lamivudine herb at price rate of $680/sachet, and we do demand about 3,000 in minimum and 10,000 in maximum.
On 15th February 2013, I received their waybill receipt from DHL shipment from India and I was surprised that the price they bought the medicinal herb (Lamivudine) is far cheaper than what we bargain. So they made excessive profit from the supply contract. The waybill shows that each 50gms of lamivudine cost $350/sachet from farmer. Meaning that each supply they made to our company will profit them about $330/sachet and then multiplied by 3,000 on minimum and 10,000 by maximum, giving them $990,000 and $3,300,000 respectively.
To the point!! I have gotten the duo contact of the direct farmers through the receipt they issued to the supplier and included it with the airway bill. When I contacted the farmers, they sent the prices to me, and I would want me and you to start the business on mutual agreement and understanding. I shall give you all the necessary information you need to start. When you sent an Application for Supply to our manager, I would make sure you are granted with an Acceptance Letter for Supply. I will persuade him to accept your application, because you shall be selling cheaper than the present suppliers. You will inform my boss that you shall be given the same quality and quantity of 50gms Lamivudine to our company at $655/sachet.
Note: GlaxoSmithKline Pharmaceutical urgently needs suppliers of these rare medicinal herbs. And they are willing to raise draft in advance to supplier, before the supply. This means that you can be paid up front, before you supply the herbs to our warehouse. But you must be able to provide few samples for a Lab-Test, before inviting you for a contract endorsement and payment.
The reason why I could not disclose this information to my boss is because I have an interest in making money as a young lady. Open up a charity organization to help the poor and needy. All I want from the business is 40% after deduction of cost and you will take 60%. Thank you and God bless you.
Ms. Victoria Wood.
Senior Secretary, Procurement manager.
This is not our blog. Are you just trying to send people to this blog about green-mayo glob? And what's a "positive revert"? Tell me more.
SUBJECT: Your blog posts are poppin!
BODY: Dear owner of http://spinachdip.blogspot.com,
Just finishing up reading a few of your more recent posts on http://spinachdip.blogspot.com.
I really like the content that you come up with. I went ahead and
forwarded your link to my fiance, he will love the site. :) I wanted to further
reach out to you because I have a team of writers and we would love to
contribute to your site by creating premium editorial articles – these feature
fresh, trending content developed by our in-house team, tailored to your
audience. You do not have to pay us anything for this.
You reap the benefits with unique, compelling articles aimed to
improve your website visibility, drive traffic and promote social interest &
shares. All articles we create are original and developed for your site only.
If you already have an editorial calendar in place, we’d like to
contribute! Or, if you’re new to these opportunities, we encourage you to give ita try.
Please do let me know if this caters to your interest.
Looking forward to your positive revert. :)
Website becomes crack.
SUBJECT: gawker is my crack.
just a random email to say i am seriously addicted to all things gawker. (not to sound like a silly fan girl robot) i'm not as politically savvy as you guys, but i know where i stand on a lot of issues. and whenever i'm not sure, i like to read your opinion. im not saying i wait for you guys to tell me what to think...but i do end up agreeing with much of what you say.
also, thanks for having more posts published during the weekend. im not joking when i say gawker is my crack. i wake up with my laptop next to my head, and immediately press " apple R" on my gawker tab and start reading. i cant get enough. whatever you guys are doing, don't stop.
finally, dare i say it? but i think im slowly becoming an approved commenter. and that is like the best compliment i could ever get. gawker approving my comment makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. " they liked it! they really really liked it!" ( i imagine here is where you guys are rolling your eyes. yah i know im a dork but everything in this email is sincere.)
i love everything u do and everything u stand for.
a loyal and appreciate reader.
Oh dearest writers and readers, have a glorious penultimate June weekend! It's officially summer now, so pay attention to the slowly reducing daylight hours.
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