A top aide to Republican New Jersey Senate candidate Steve Lonegan suggested yesterday that Lonegan's opponent, Cory Booker, is gay. Why? Because Booker didn't tell a smokin' hot stripper that he wanted to suck her boobs, of course.
Rick Shaftan, a key Lonegan strategist, says a lot in this interview with Talking Points Memo's Hunter Walker, including that Booker is spending his ad money unwisely and ignoring senior voters. But surely the best bit comes when Shaftan starts in on how Booker's rather mild Twitter flirtation with an Oregon stripper named Lynsie Lee—in which he cornily says, "[T]he East Coast loves you and by the East Coast, I mean me"—could be perceived as the words of a gay man (emphasis ours):
"It was just weird. I mean, to me, you know, hey, if he said, 'Hey, you got really hot breasts man, I'd love to suck on them.' Then like, yeah, cool. But like, he didn't say that," Shaftan explained. "It was like kind of like, I don't know, it was like what a gay guy would say to a stripper. It's the way he was talking to her. It's just like like there was no sexual interest at all. I don't know. To me, if I was single and you know like some stripper was tweeting me, I might take advantage of the perks of the office, you know?"
"You got really hot breasts, man, I'd love to suck on them," sounds very gay actually. But what do we know.
Booker has said of his Twitter messages to Lee, who was in a documentary about Twitter with Booker, that they are merely evidence he's adept at "listening to people and engaging with people no matter what their profession." But Shaftan, who we should remind you is not a teenage boy, calls bullshit, because there's no way someone could have interacted with Lee without noticing her bodacious hooters.
"This is strange. It's just weird. ... It's like, 'I don't know who she is. I don't know anything about her.' Get the fuck out of here dude. You can't follow her Twitter page and not know she's got those great breasts. How do you fucking not know?" Shaftan said. "It's just too odd and people they just wonder, like, who does this guy really want to work for? Who's he representing?"
It's a good question: Who is Cory Booker out to represent when he flagrantly ignores this one lady's boobs and fails to tell her he wants to suck 'em? What is he hiding? I bet Steve Lonegan would offer to suck her boobs. I bet he'd offer to squeeze 'em, too. For the good of the nation.
Despite his failure to offer quality boob sucking on Twitter, Booker currently has a double-digit lead over Lonegan in the polls. The election is Wednesday.
Update: Shaftan has been fired from Lonegan's campaign.
[Image via AP]