Comments from The Cooler

The Cooler commented on Christian Bale Is Often Angry

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 17:10:46 EDT

I guess Blakeley has to go return some videotapes now.

The Cooler commented on Deep In The Heart Of Nilla Brooklyn

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 12:42:24 EDT

@edisdead: No one is saying it's a bad neighborhood or that you shouldn't live there. But the people in that magazine look nothing like the (vast majority of) people who actually live there.

The Cooler commented on How The Dark Knight Became the Biggest Movie In the History of Ever

Mon, 21 Jul 2008 11:28:24 EDT

@it takes a lot to laugh: Adjusted for inflation, Gone With The Wind is still the highest grossing movie of all time.

The Cooler commented on The Dark Knight Twice As Long As It Should Be

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 15:20:29 EDT

Thank you, Graeme. You wrote exactly was I was thinking, but couldn't put in words. A great movie was nearly ruined, by a tedious and pointless third (or was it fourth or fifth?) act.

The Cooler commented on The Mournful Music of Footloose?

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 14:34:39 EDT

Kevin Bacon as a semi-shirtless dancing acrobat? What's gay about that?

The Cooler commented on Monkeys Win, Every Time

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 12:14:01 EDT

I simply refuse to believe this. This is Jayson Blair level fraud on the part of the Times.

The Cooler commented on Times' Dark Knight Review

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 08:30:38 EDT

@crooked_teeth: Yeah, it was about 45 minutes too long and the entire Harvey Dent subplot was botched. But Ledger did still steal the show as expected.

The Cooler commented on New York, Destroyed 15 Different Ways

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:38:12 EDT

@blakeley: Actually, in the DC Universe, Gotham and NYC (and Metropolis) are all distinct places.

The Cooler commented on New York, Destroyed 15 Different Ways

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:35:38 EDT

"War of The Worlds" took place in Bayonne, New Jersey

The Cooler commented on Maple Bats: Wooden Death Clubs Of Chaos

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:13:14 EDT

Um ... only one of those pictures actually involved a broken bat. (Vs. 2 foul balls and at least 3 bats arriving in the stands fully intact.)

But hey, I'm sold! Ban 'em all!!!

The Cooler commented on Be Nice To Writers Or They'll Give You A Brain Tumor

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 14:54:54 EDT

They should just give her the shaft. You know ... have her character fall down an elevator shaft.

The Cooler commented on MLB All-Star Game Live Blog

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 00:09:24 EDT

MIGGY!!!

The Cooler commented on The Crankiest Fox Blonde of All

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 11:26:22 EDT

That was great. It was like watching Earl Weaver trying to coach a JV baseball team.

The Cooler commented on Julia TV: Confirmed

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 08:40:43 EDT

I think Wired, Bravo, and even Julia herself, are seriously overestimating the number of people who truly care about her exploits and will tune in to learn more. Of course, this also means that some day every soon she will actually have to start producing ... something. She's created a remarkable opportunity do that, but now she will be asked to deliver a product that is more than just a personality and I'm seriously questioning if that will ever happen. (Or even what that something could possibly be.)

The Cooler commented on Floor-by-Floor Demolition Blows Minds, Saves Environment

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 14:23:51 EDT

Now about reversing the process to construct a building? Now that would be somethin'!

The Cooler commented on NCAA Final Four Broadcaster, Archangel of Death, Billy Packer Axed from CBS After 34 Years

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 14:03:51 EDT

@Gio: Exactly again. Asshole or no, the guy knew his shit.

The Cooler commented on NCAA Final Four Broadcaster, Archangel of Death, Billy Packer Axed from CBS After 34 Years

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 12:35:46 EDT

@williamzabka: Exactly. When we're knee-deep in Clark "When You Can't Find The Proper Words, Just Make Some Up" Kellogg Era, the words "be careful what you wish for" will provide little comfort.

The Cooler commented on Nonsociety's Video Remix: Valtrex Edition

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 12:23:23 EDT

Good grief, can we stop with the "Al Gore invented the internet jokes"? That is the absolute laziest humor bit in the entire world. (Next to jokes about Rachel Sklar's rack, of course.)

The Cooler commented on Sacha Baron Cohen's Gay Fight Night Hoax

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 13:51:34 EDT

@restoration_rake: Because he's completely overrated and rarely does anything truly funny? Yeah, that does sound right.

The Cooler commented on The Case Against "Crazy Irena Briganti," From Those Who Know Her Best

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 13:22:08 EDT

Oh, well ... she was polite to a college classmate 15 years ago. You should definitely retract all your earlier stories then.

The Cooler commented on Definitely Harrod's

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 22:20:34 EDT

I'm sorry, I though you said "stage version of the film Rain Man", but that can't possibly be correct. Even the most idiotic savant would never attempt such a thing.

The Cooler commented on The Highline's Only Lawn

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 16:22:08 EDT

@Phyllis Nefler: Seriously, like New Yorkers need more places to walk? That's all we fucking do! (The poor ones anyway.)

The Cooler commented on CBS War Correspondent Gets Promotion, Sex Scandal

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 11:21:53 EDT

Do you think that Chmielowiec, a lawyer, really shouted out that quote? Nobody paints a picture like the ENQUIRER!!

The Cooler commented on Your Morning Video Wake Up Call

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 09:39:31 EDT

Uh, can we please get the conlcusion of the reed sucking discussion. It was just about to get interesting.

The Cooler commented on How a 730-Ton Ball Kept the Second Tallest Building From Falling During the Chinese Earthquake

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 13:41:32 EDT

@tehdahl: No, I don't. That's why I asked, dick.

The Cooler commented on How a 730-Ton Ball Kept the Second Tallest Building From Falling During the Chinese Earthquake

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 11:57:29 EDT

So what keeps the ball from breaking loose in an earthquake and taking the building down with it? Another smaller ball inside it?

The Cooler commented on Russert Death Wikipedia Leaker Fired

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 08:22:53 EDT

@PRIsNotJournalism: Yeah, they do. It's called making sure their employees do their fucking job.

@ZiggyStardust: Wikipedia is not a news site.

The Cooler commented on Where Did All The News Go?

Fri, 20 Jun 2008 15:29:48 EDT

Yeah ... and it's awesome. Don't jinx it.

The Cooler commented on Peggy Noonan Is America's Princess

Fri, 20 Jun 2008 15:08:58 EDT

Agreed. I didn't realize she was even aware that it is not 1987 anymore.

The Cooler commented on He Calls This Move 'The Spanish Prostate Exam'

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 16:52:51 EDT

I would say as soon as you get gored twice in one day it's time to take "best bullfighter of all time" off your business cards.

The Cooler commented on New Yorkers to Roam Streets Unmolested for Three Car-Free Days This Summer

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 16:01:11 EDT

Bloomberg has implemented some pretty clever and brave ideas. This is not one of them.

The Cooler commented on Preparing For The Tour De Lance

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 09:13:24 EDT

Jesus, the guy is a fucking cyclist. And a retired one at that. Since when has that ever played with the ladies (who aren't also cyclists)?

The Cooler commented on Secret New World Order Meeting Inspires Awesome Blast Emails

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 12:20:34 EDT

Yes, I'm really interested in Thrillist's take on this. Perhaps they can tell me where Prime Minister Gordon Brown got his $800 shoe shine kit/premium vodka dispenser.

The Cooler commented on Why Do So Many Star Athletes Go Broke?

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 11:43:38 EDT

@ADismalScience: Change "sports" to "all forms of popular entertainment" and you're on to something.

The Cooler commented on Liz Smith Thinks Col Allan Is 'Absolute Total Shit!'

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 16:06:31 EDT

"And the quote should have read 'Col Allan is absolute total shit HEAD! -toodles, Liz"

The Cooler commented on Teenage Punks Must Apologize On YouTube For Being Dumb

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 11:39:37 EDT

The real solution? Severe tire damage-creating spikes that can be deployed by the window worker at the push of the button.

The Cooler commented on Somebody Has Been Watching "Rookie Of The Year"

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 09:23:00 EDT

Umm, hello? Bad News Bears In Breaking Training? Geez, I'm not that old, am I?

Oh, and I defy at Fark to name the second-worst call in college baseball history. Or name any bad call from college baseball history.

The Cooler commented on Hit-And-Run Apathy Video Proves People Are Bad

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:40:14 EDT

@The Cooler: Well, maybe not Flushing.

The Cooler commented on Hit-And-Run Apathy Video Proves People Are Bad

Fri, 06 Jun 2008 09:39:27 EDT

Exactly. If that had happened in Flushing, the driver would have been pulled out of his still running car and he'd be the one paralyzed in the hospital. Mob justice is the best justice.

The Cooler commented on 'I Spit on Your Grave' Remake Promises Even Motorboatier Disembowlements Than Before

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 15:05:05 EDT

Lohan. Please let it be Lohan...

P.S. "Suck it, bitch!"