elsworthy commented on Want A Baby Boy? Eat A Burger For Breakfast

"I work in statistics (medical ones, even)."

elsworthy commented on "Not Even Her Milky Tits Can Hide The Fact That She's Almost The Size Of A Small Minivan"

"I am wondering if the women-bashing-other-women thing is a kind of societal Stockholm Syndrome - the bashing has become so constant on the 'web that it's join or go mad. As for the woman hate - it's always been there with some guys, but the intarwebs makes it easier to see."

elsworthy commented on Mark Ronson: On The Move

"The buttons on the coat say "not hip", the boots say "thrift store hip", the bag says "my parents wanted me to go to medical school"."

elsworthy commented on Damien Hirst Is Really Into Jeans

"I will just sit here and slowly slam my head into the wall until I can forget all those years studying fine art. They'll find me, dead, with "what's the use?" written in blood by my lifeless body."

elsworthy commented on The Rise And Fall Of Katie Couric

"She's actually neither hard nor soft enough to work on television, but I don't think that's really her fault - it's the fault of excecs who haven't really grasped that the next wave of news reporting is on-line."

elsworthy commented on Beckham's Brush With The Law

"I am obsessed with the sun visor across his forehead - it looks like a really cutting-edge Ascot hat - "now with mirror so your friends can admire themselves while pretending to pay attention to you". ...And that's a very fetching "I didn't mean to do it, whatever it is I did" smile he's throwing the officer there."

elsworthy commented on Jay-Z: One Step Away From An Adidas Disaster

"Dude!"

elsworthy commented on Energy Drink Boosts Spirits, Weens

" "Hard Times Mean Stiff Penalty for Boost" "Boner of a Lawsuit puts Johnson in the Box""

elsworthy commented on 'Teen Vogue' Commenters: Friends, Or Frenemies?

" I think the guys responsible for the "weekly World News" write these comments on their lunch break."