Last night, tweeting British man Piers Morgan aired the first part of “Killer Women,” a new special that, according to Piers, will “chill your soul.” But which part of meeting a killer did Piers find most terrifying? That someone so young and so hot could be so murdery at the very same time.
Piers interviews several “killer women” over the course of the episode, but no one upsets him quite like convicted felon Erin Caffey. Thankfully, Piers captured his horror in a column for Rupert Murdoch’s beloved UK rag The Sun:
...I’ve never met anyone who sent chills up my spine quite like Erin Caffey.
Why? Because she’s a pretty, sweet, smiley, 4ft 11in, God- fearing young lady with a voice like an angel . . . who masterminded the savage slaughter of her entire family.
How does he know that this woman who orchestrated her mother and brothers’ murders also happens to have the voice of an angel? Because he asked her to sing.
A blood-curdling, sexy-ass song. Piers can hardly believe it. He writes:
As I sit just two feet away from her, it’s almost impossible to understand how this tiny, beguiling woman could be capable of such pure evil.
Against all good sense, Piers continues:
Perhaps the most surreal moment of our interview came when she sang Amazing Grace for me, pitch-perfect. I believe Erin knew exactly what she was doing at the time of the murders, and knows now exactly how culpable she was.
Finally, at the end of Caffey’s tale, Piers asks himself whether he could forgive Caffey were she his daughter, writing, “I just don’t know what I’d do.”
But that was not the end of it. The struggle to comprehend how a pretty girl could both sing and kill continued on Piers’ Twitter account:
I want to die.— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) September 2, 2012