Playground Bans Winnie-the-Pooh for Being Pantsless, "Sexually Dubious"

Winnie-the-Pooh, a beloved companion to generations of children, has reportedly been banned from a Polish playground for his lack of pants and his allegedly fuzzy gender identity. Oh, bother.

A.A. Milne's famous character was being considered as the face of a new playground in Tuszyn, Poland, the Croatian Times reports, but members of the local council found certain aspects of the bear "disturbing" and "inappropriate."

"The problem with that bear is it doesn't have a complete wardrobe," said Councillor Ryszard Cichy, referring to Pooh's lack of pants. He felt a Polish fictional bear, which is completely clothed, would be a better pick.

Pooh, of course, doesn't wear pants because he doesn't have genitalia and is a bear. He's a totally non-sexual children's character (except on the internet, where rule 34 exists and everything is terrible).

But that argument didn't fly with the local council, which apparently spent a lot of time considering the finer points of a cartoon bear's anatomy.

"It doesn't wear underpants because it doesn't have a sex. It's a hermaphrodite," one official reportedly said.