Poor Joe Biden Can't Get Anybody To Buy His Book

Everybody claims to love Joe Biden, but in fact nobody wants to hear his story. They just want to objectify him as the "cool old creep" who somehow became vice president. If people truly cared about Joe Biden, he would've made a lot more than "less than $201" on book sales.

Barack Obama has written three books: a sort of '90s memoir about nothing, a campaign book to put out there so he could run for president, and some children's board book or whatever it was with pictures by somebody else. And people buy these things! You would think these Barack Obama books are about werewolves and vampires having sex with teenagers, the way people buy Barack Obama's books.

Barack Obama made "between $100,000 and $1 million in royalties" each for Dreams From My Father and Of Thee I Sing in 2012, and "between $50,000 and $100,000" for The Audacity of Hope. This means he could have earned up to $2.1 million last year on some old books and a celebrity author children's book. When you're president, you sell lots of books. Even George W. Bush had a huge bestseller, and he can just barely write very basic sentences with the wrong punctuation.

Joe Biden supposedly wrote a pretty solid book for a campaign book. It's got 62 Amazon reviews and four-and-a-half stars. It's got a bad title, Promises To Keep, that sounds very close to George W. Bush's idiotic campaign memoir, A Charge To Keep. But lots of books have bad titles. Of Thee I Sing? That sounds like something Sarah Palin's agent would name a book with Sarah Palin's name on it: patriotic vagary.

The vice president of the United States made "less than $201" on book royalties last year. I made twice that in book royalties last year, and I don't even have any books in print, and I've never even run for president, let alone become the vice president, twice.

How is Joe Biden going to make it after he leaves the White House? The man has no income to speak of, and no savings. He is basically a few paychecks away from being homeless.

[Photo by Getty Images.]