Gawker: Shoes

Zooey Deschanel Drops Lawsuit Over Candies

Max Read — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 10:55:12 EST

Animated Hipstamatic photograph Zooey Deschanel dropped her lawsuit against Steve Madden over an alleged endorsement and a Candies shoe known as "the Zooey." More »

College Ruffians Expelled for Starring in Disturbing Shoe Attack Video

Lauri Apple — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 11:15:15 EST

Back in the halycon days called "the 1990s," you could beat up a man, rip the expensive athletic shoes off his feet, and carry your lace-up trophies away without being caught. No iPhones, no problems. No more! More »

Anchor Trips Over Orgasm-Inducing Shoes on Live TV

Matt Cherette — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 01:55:44 EDT

"My arch helps me to climax." That's what WPIX anchor Sukanya Krishnan said on Wednesday morning just before she fell to the ground during a segment about shoe designer Christian Louboutin's claim that high heels can help women orgasm. The jury may still be out on the orgasmic potential of a pair of Louboutins, but their ability to make someone topple over on live TV is now well-documented. [WPIX] More »

Painful High-Heels Are Like Orgasms on Your Feet

Lauri Apple — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 05:59:09 EDT

Women don't just wear high-heels because we're suckers who will do anything for a man's attention, but because high-heels possess orgasmic potential, says would-be red-bottomed sole monopolist Christian Louboutin. Also, women are "happy to wear painful shoes," because our shoes help us express ourselves. At least one libido-pain shoe expert agrees. More »

Reebok's Fake Magic Butt Shoes Are Fake, Says FTC

Hamilton Nolan — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 16:38:47 EDT

For a while now Reebok has been selling its dumb fake "EasyTone" shoes that allegedly tone your butt (ladies), using magic. If you believed that Reebok EasyTone shoes would tone your butt, you are dumb. Well, now Reebok has to pay $25 million, for fooling you. More »

Tom Brady Wears UGGs, Haha, Loser

Hamilton Nolan — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 09:02:35 EDT

I bet the whole first half of this ad isn't even Tom Brady's feet. I bet he was like "Look, I'll do your UGG ad for a billion dollars but no way am I actually putting a pair of UGGs on my feet, even though I am the world's biggest metrosexual. That's not even manly enough for me, and look at my haircut." Also Mos Def changed his name immediately after doing the soundtrack to this ad, for obvious reasons. More »

Shoe-Wearing to Return to Airport Security, Maybe in Time for Spiky Shoe Trend?

Maureen O'Connor — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 14:15:04 EDT

It's a TSA metal detector party, and your ugly footwear will soon be invited. Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano tells Politico's Mike Allen that air travelers will soon be permitted to keep their shoes on during security checks: More »

Christian Louboutin Can't Stop the Inevitable Flood of Red-Soled Shoes

Brian Moylan — Wed, 10 Aug 2011 18:27:31 EDT

A Manhattan judge denied an injunction today brought by luxury shoemaker Christian Louboutin who has been trying to prevent Yves Saint Laurent from selling shoes with red soles beginning this fall. Guess those pumps you paid way too much for just depreciated in value. More »

Manic Shoe-Licker Is the Latest NYC Subway Menace

Adrian Chen — Mon, 16 May 2011 12:26:31 EDT

The cliche about New York City is that the amount of time spent in transit means New Yorkers do in public things suburbanites might keep locked behind French doors. Like breaking up with your girlfriend, or cleaning your shoes with your tongue. More »

It's Official: Flip-Flops Are Evil

Brian Moylan — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 13:40:49 EDT

Personally, I think everyone's favorite warm-weather and beach footwear, the flip-flop, is disgusting. Not only is there now someone to back up my claim with medical evidence, but it appears that the rubbery soles are horrible for your body as well. More »

Put Your Shoes Back On, Privileged Techies

Ryan Tate — Tue, 05 Apr 2011 14:12:47 EDT

Employees at Google and AOL are among those going barefoot today to raise awareness of shoeless poor kids. If only there were some other way rich techies could help third world children, aside from disgustingly and dangerously removing their shoes! More »

Suri Cruise Tries on High Heels: A Two-Part Miniseries

Maureen O'Connor — Mon, 10 Jan 2011 13:11:03 EST

Suri Cruise, the only toddler in the world capable of "stepping out," hones her heralded fashion sense while shoe-shopping on Vancouver. See the immaculate daughter of Xenu clomp around in heels the way all little girls do, ahead. More »

The Rules for Wearing Flip-Flops

Brian Moylan — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 15:31:37 EST

Everyone is in a tizzy because Barack Obama dared to wear flip-flops while on vacation. Really? Just so there's never confusion on this matter again, we're going to break down the rules for when it's appropriate to wear them. More »

And Now, a Dog Trying to Walk While Wearing Shoes

Matt Cherette — Thu, 02 Dec 2010 15:32:27 EST

Superman's weakness? Kryptonite. Man's Best Friend's weakness? A double pair of shoes, apparently! Meet Booba, a Shih Tzu with a knack for being OMG SO CUTE, and a non-knack for being able to walk while fitted with four yellow sneakers. More »

Introducing Facebook Shoes

Ryan Tate — Mon, 29 Nov 2010 15:11:30 EST

Privacy is so last season. And Scottish designer Gerry Mckay has the perfect footwear to ring in an oversharey 2011: Adidas trainers touting social network affiliations. More »

Kathie Lee Disses Pair of $2,400 Christian Louboutin Heels: "I've Seen Hookers in Better Shoes"

Whitney Jefferson — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 13:14:08 EDT

The fourth hour of Today was given pairs of the sexiest shoes (as ranked by Saks 5th Avenue) which included Jimmy Choo, Dolce and Gabbana, and a pair of Christian Louboutin heels. Let's just say they're not Kathie Lee's style. More »

Michael Bloomberg Has Two Pairs of Shoes and Doesn't Need Anymore, Okay?

Jim Newell — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 12:18:34 EDT

NYC's mayor-of-the-people Michael Bloomberg only owns two pairs of work shoes. They're very expensive, though. More »

Obese People Don't Have Enough Crap to Buy

Hamilton Nolan — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 11:22:02 EDT

Despite our ongoing educational campaign about the fact that bullshit "toning shoes" are bullshit, the segment grew by more than 800% in 2009. BIG SIGH. The ironic part? Obese people barely have any bullshit products to call their own! More »

Fat, Lazy Americans Will Soon Have Shoes That Tie Themselves

Brian Moylan — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 17:10:07 EDT

Footwear innovator Nike has seen the future, and it is a world where everyone is so fat, they can't tie their own laces. They've filed a patent for self-tying sneakers. Did they miss the invention of Velcro? More »

Seeing a Celebrity Endorse a Pair of Shoes Alters a Woman's Brain, Scientists Say

Maureen O'Connor — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 16:32:47 EDT

Dutch brain scientists have discovered that when a woman sees cute shoes affixed to Sarah Jessica Parker's feet, her medial orbitofrontal cortex goes bonkers. Why anyone would study the effect of celebrity shoes on female brains? More »

Marty McFly Isn't Here, But You Can Check Out His Auto-Lacing Shoes

Max Read — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 20:58:36 EDT

Still bummed you fell for the Back to the Future today-is-the-day-Marty-McFly-traveled-to hoax? Console yourself with DIY auto-lacing shoes inspired by Back to the Future 2. It's no hoverboard, but it's lazy, which is what the future is all about. [Make] More »

This Is The World's Oldest Leather Shoe

Adrian Chen — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 19:40:00 EDT

Archaeologists found this 5,500 year-old shoe in an Armenian cave. The ~size 7 women's leather shoe was preserved under a layer of sheep poop. Researchers speculate it was a "really fresh" throwback to a 5,515 year-old model. [NYT] More »

Freed from the Tyranny of Sex and the City, Sarah Jessica Finally Gets Comfortable Shoes

Maureen O'Connor — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 15:35:59 EDT

Sex and the City, Sarah Jessica Finally Gets Comfortable Shoes" alt="Click here to read Freed from the Tyranny of Sex and the City, Sarah Jessica Finally Gets Comfortable Shoes" src="http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/7/2010/06/sjpboots.jpg"/>

[The clotheshorse formerly known as Carrie Bradshaw walks son James Wilke Broderick to school in the West Village. Image via Splash.] More »

Americans Now Falling For Different Fitness Scams

Hamilton Nolan — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 14:41:49 EDT

Who says that Americans are a bunch of lazy suckers who believe that they can get in shape only by purchasing video games and fancy gizmos? Now, Americans know they must instead purchase magic swimsuits and pseudoscientific shoes. Fitness ahoy! More »

'Croc' Is the Sound You Make When You Throw Up

Hamilton Nolan — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 12:25:43 EDT

Crocs lost $227 million in the past two years. The bad news: Crocs still exists. More »

Scorned Shoeshiner Busted for Arson

Jeff Neumann — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 05:32:29 EDT

When 72-year-old John Swain was kicked off the Bryant Park shoeshine stand, he decided to take matters into his own hands. So he torched it. Twice. The man who fired Swain said "he seemed like a level-headed guy." [NYP, pic] More »

Let's All Party as America Reverts to its Prehistoric State

Hamilton Nolan — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 16:30:31 EST

The Way We Live Now: Wackily. What is life but risk by another name? We're betting our pensions! We're quitting Wal-Mart and Burger King and wearing crazy bedazzled shoes! We're living in style, for we all shall die! Soon. More »

Reebok Just Taunting Women with Dumb Butt Shoes

Hamilton Nolan — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 12:10:05 EST

Oh hell, Reebok is now using even more gratuitously porny buttock photos to enhance the bullshit buttocks-toning promise of its allegedly buttocks-toning magic shoes, which are—god—so fake. Try attaching handles to the model and doing deadlifts, instead. [Copyranter] More »

Rich Lady Wants You and Your Grubby Shoes to Know She Is Not a Bad Hostess

Brian Moylan — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 16:05:26 EST

Suzanne Murphy hates shoes and grime. She hates them so much that an invitation to a recent party said no shoes allowed. She is not ashamed because she she loves her "super comfy" carpets. More »

Actually, Yes, I Do Mind Taking Off My Shoes

Brian Moylan — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 13:09:38 EST

There is nothing worse than arriving at someone's home — especially for a fancy, high-society party — and being asked if you mind taking off your shoes. Yes, I mind. It is disgusting and it needs to stop. More »

Ladies, Moments Like These Are Why Your Boyfriend Won't Watch The View

Whitney Jefferson — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 12:22:16 EST

The View" alt="Click here to read Ladies, Moments Like These Are Why Your Boyfriend Won't Watch The View" src="http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/13242/2009/12/screen_shot_2009-12-16_at_12.08.50_pm.png"/>

You know it's going to be a classic episode when in the first twenty seconds on-air, the words uterus and nipples are uttered. That, and the focus on these things resembling futuristic space shuttles attached to Whoopi's feet. More »

Feet First

cityfile — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 15:24:00 EST

A new survey involving 1,000 women in Britain finds that women are much more likely to remember the first pair of shoes they bought than the name of the first guy they kissed. [Telegraph via The Cut] More »

Magic Shoes and Magic Cookies: Bullshit

Hamilton Nolan — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 11:11:38 EST

You know what else is bullshit, besides juice cleanses? The idea that wearing some ugly Reeboks with a curvy sole will give you an Ass of Steel. Bullshit. Also, cookie diets? Bullshit. More »

Bianco Footwear: Hands Are So Last Year

Daniel Barnum-Swett — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 16:30:05 EST

Notorious for its comically shocking advertisements, Bianco Footwear imagines extreme up-selling with its commercial, Hands Are So Last Year. The message is clear despite the language barrier, but beware: never match your shoes to your other shoes. More »

Baghdad Shoe Hurler Victory Tour Starts Tomorrow

Hamilton Nolan — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 10:05:03 EDT

Iraqi shoe thrower and hero journalist Muntadhar al-Zeidi was scheduled to be released from prison today, but he'll have to wait one more day due to ~~beatings~~ paperwork delays. Fine. If he gets out with his testicles intact, he wins. More »

Jimmy Choos and Ziplock Bags Don't Go Together

cityfile — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 10:54:00 EDT

These are difficult economic times, sure. And keeping up appearances isn't easy, especially if you follow the advice of some experts who argue that you need to look even better than usual during a financial downturn. But you can only cut costs and stoop so far, you know? If you insist on buying really expensive heels even when you can't afford them, but you then wrap your feet in plastic bags so you can return the shoes in a few weeks, you probably should just do your shoe shopping at Payless and call it a day. Really. We'll forgive you. [HuffPo] More »

Teenager To Be Suspended For Taking Girlfriend To Prom, Dancing, and Embracing Satan

Foster Kamer — Sun, 10 May 2009 17:24:49 EDT

High school sucks sometimes. Prime example: boy finds date, boy goes to the big dance, and boy probably returns home at a reasonable hour. What happens? Boy gets suspended. More »

Shoe-Throwing Is So Last Season

Hamilton Nolan — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 10:38:22 EDT

When it comes to things to throw at dirty politicians, there are so many options—tomatoes, furniture, urine-filled water balloons, etc. Why not think big? Alas, India is stuck in shoe-throwing rut. Biters! More »

Hero Shoe Thrower Gets 3 Years in Jail

Hamilton Nolan — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 09:22:48 EDT

Iraqi—and, indeed, global—hero Muntader al-Zaidi, whose act of hurling his shoes at failed president GW Bush proved him superior to all other political journalists, is going to jail. Despite having an excuse: More »

Hero Shoe-Thrower's Trial Delayed

Pareene — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 12:50:22 EST

The Iraqi shoe-thrower guy was in court today and he has a pretty awesome defense: President Bush was not a "guest," so throwing a shoe at him was not even impolite. More »