Student Arrested for Repeatedly Mailing Poop to Vice Principal

The year of the heroic teen continues: On Monday, a high school senior was arrested for repeatedly mailing packages containing cow and dog shit to his school's vice principal.

The reasons for the alleged shit mailing remain unknown but here are the facts—via The Daily Times—as we know them now: On April 30, Mark Flynn, the vice principal of Stephen Decatur High School in Worcester County, Md., told a sheriff's deputy he'd received a package containing some sort of excrement. The deputy contacted the local Post Office, telling them to look out for any other suspicious packages addressed to Flynn.

Two days later, someone dropped off two more packages for Vice Principal Flynn, both of which were later found to contain poop. Thankfully for police and Vice Principal Flynn, the quick-thinking postal inspector had written down the poop-mailer's license plate number.

The Worcester County Sheriff's Office tracked the car to the the teen's home. Deputies found him in the parking lot of a nearby McDonald's; upon searching his car, they found "a large quantity of alcohol." The teen later confessed to mailing the poop, telling police he got it from a cow and a dog.

He was arrested and charged with three counts of disturbing activities at school, three counts of molesting a school administrator, and underage alcohol possession. The school, seeking to make an example and squelch any shit-mailing copy cats, hit the teen with their harshest non-expulsion penalty: a ten-day suspension.

"We do promote a respectful and positive learning environment," Barb Witherow, a spokeswoman for Worcester County Schools, said. "Any inappropriate or disruptive or illegal activity is not acceptable."

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