There’s an old joke that goes something like: “Boy, the food at this place is really terrible,” says one Subway customer to another. “Yeah, I know,” says the second guy, “and such small portions.” Well, those two customers really exist, and they sued the company for false advertising back in 2013. In an attempt to finally settle the case this week, Subway agreed to start measuring its footlong sandwiches to make sure they really live up to their names.
Previously, franchisees were allowed to take the same liberties with measurement that pro athletes do—it was fine for a footlong sandwich to be 11 inches. Under the settlement, Subway employees will be required to measure every piece of bread, and there will be regular compliance inspections to make sure they don’t fuck it up.
The rules are quite specific: “The sampling will include measuring at least 10 baked breads in total, and breads using both the Italian and 9-Grain Wheat loaves will be included in the sample.”
If the class-action plaintiffs take this settlement in the interest of Sandwich Justice, they’ll get their legal fees paid, but won’t receive direct compensation for the inches of Subway’s distinctive-smelling bread they were allegedly cheated out of.