Not literally, of course.

 Reply

Ladies and gentleman of the Jury....A douche is a device used to introduce a stream of water into the body for medical or hygienic reasons. The word comes from the French language, in which its principal meaning is a shower. And as you may surmise, if not already readily acquainted with such, you may know that a douche BAG is a piece of equipment for douching: simply put, a bag for holding the water or fluid to douche. Nevertheless, we have not been summoned here to argue the pros and cons of douching or the possible vageries of such. No. It is the SLAAANG usage of the word Douche bag which we will examine here. To that effect, it is the intention of this court to prove that Mr. Minelli is INDEED a (making quote signs with fingers) doooosh baaag, not in the literal sense of the word, but in the metaphorical sense, and that he women with whom he is so fortunate to have relationships with, be they either in the platonic or in the sexual sense as is suggest herein, and albeit however loose or (makes quote signs with fingers again) sluh TEE, that said women may be, such women may still be considered (finger quotes AGAIN) haawt or sexually desirable...yet they are quite CLEARLY beyond Mr Minelli's station....and that HE (points at Mr Minelli while facing jury)...HE is.CLEARLY underserving of their attention and/or affection. I shall prove this metaphor is, for all intents and purposes, is indeed apt and that Mr. Minelli is a person with variety of negative qualities, specifically arrogance and malice. IN SHORT, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...MR. MINELLI....IS INDEED.....A....(scans jury with eyes) douchebag. (Turns on heels...walks away).........

.....of course, murmurs followed by brief wacks of gavel ensue.

 Reply