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  • downsizing

    Website Shrinks Self into a Twitter Stream

    If failing print publications go online-only, what can struggling websites do, short of closing? Turn into microblogs, naturally. It seems to be working for AdWeak, the advertising world's own Onion. More »
    07/10/09
    4,297
    7

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by belltolls: This could work for many information sites. Tom Petty said it best: the wading is the hardest part. 2 Responses | Other threads

  • Billy Mays

    Dead Man Sells Adhesives

    Billy Mays is dead, but his ghost will return to haunt your television until you order roll after roll of Mighty Tape, to quiet the bearded demon. It's what he would have wanted. More »
    07/10/09
    2,345
    30

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Awesome X: My favorite is when he dances with Bing Crosby. CGI, FTW. 3 Responses | Other threads

  • badvertising

    The Jailhouse Assault Dreamed Up by Angry Tech, Media Companies

    So the copyright wars have come to this: Incensed over rampant online file sharing, some of the largest software and media companies show how copyright violations can get you brutalized in jail. Subtle. More »
    07/09/09
    3,336
    24

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by LeighAnne: Do I get a dreamy prison boyfriend like Christopher Keller? more » | Other threads

  • wtf

    Russian Alcoholism and Britney Spears Combine to Comedic Effect

    A chance to laugh at foreigners! This ad for some English-language school in Russia shows some old Russian people singing "Hit Me Baby One More Time," all crazy and Russian-like. They probably didn't even pay royalties! Then, the big reveal: More »
    07/09/09
    5,652
    36

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by snugbug: Nice xenophobic touch here.. Russians = all alcoholics, right? I see what you're doing! Trying to up your dwindling comments... 6 Responses | Other threads

  • internal memos

    How The Onion Will Sell Out

    The Onion is hurting badly. And CEO Steve Hannah has already gleaned a lesson from the downturn, explained in the memo after the jump: resisting advertisers is a "losing game." More »
    07/09/09
    10,306
    57

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by kookla: You can't make this stuff up! 4 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Burger King Will Regret Posing Hindu Goddess on Ham Sandwich

    Burger King is constantly getting tons of free publicity for its outrageous offensive (and wacky!) ads, which it sometimes apologizes for afterward. Could this be a purposeful strategy? Of course! But now they're fucking with the goddess Lakshmi. Bad move. More »
    07/09/09
    7,156
    38

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by aMagnificentBasterd: All Hindus are vegetarians? Who the hell is serving me the Pork Vindaloo? 8 Responses | Other threads

  • Media Crack

    Rupert Murdoch Declares Culture War

    In your woebegone Wednesday media column: the WSJ takes on the NYT's culture section in a total death match, TV networks not upset they lost $23 in ad money covering MJ, more Hobo New York Times coverage, and newspapers burn. More »
    07/08/09
    3,933
    4

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by son of spam: Murdoch's right about the NYT coverage. Now, did he say anything about a "Women of Sotheby's" feature on page 3? more » | Other threads

  • champions

    Marijuana Smoker Lands Fast Food Job

    While you were all just hanging out last weekend swimming in a pool and smoking weed, Michael Phelps was being quietly reintroduced as a pitchman for Subway. More »
    07/07/09
    5,032
    37

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by ithabeleng metesunyane: Jared (the guy who lost all the weight who is in all the Subway commercials) looks like he has put... 4 Responses | Other threads

  • youtube

    Newspaper Argues the Internet is Even Killing the Internet

    The Independent has a massive piece today on YouTube and how, despite having close to 350 million users worldwide per month, it's set to lose almost half a billion dollars this year. And it's all your fault, naturally. More »
    07/07/09
    4,327
    31

    By The Cajun Boy

    Comment by Airvault: That "twenty hours of video uploaded per minute" figure honestly amazes me, given that the majority of the videos uploaded... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Walt Whitman Sells Out

    "America/ Centre of equal daughters, equal sons/ All, all alike endear'd, grown, ungrown, young or old/ Strong, ample, fair, enduring, capable, rich/ Enough to buy some Levi's." Hey, you try making money as a dead poet these days. [via Adfreak]
    07/06/09
    1,711
    11

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by edubu: I thought "he"(his estate?) sold out when he allowed a crappy mall on Long Island to be named after him... 1 Responses | Other threads

  • Media Crack

    Haha, 'The Ennuist'

    In your sunny(!) Monday media column: Macy's costs the newspaper industry $600 million, Vogue is dreadfully low-class, The Daily Beast speaks very well of a book, and here's the name of new thing to write for: 'The Ennuist.' Haha. More »
    07/06/09
    7,463
    21

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by GooberSaysHey: "New Orleans: Is It Still There?" Ugh, I have nothing to say to this. 3 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Twitter Loses Revenue Virginity

    There was something innocent and pure about Twitter's total lack of income. But don't worry, the microblogging startup's first advertisements are sufficiently adorable. More »
    07/06/09
    7,582
    11

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by Trulymadlyme: I am thisclose to breaking up with twitter. I keep getting followed by creepy porno spam bots. It's going the... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Should Police Academy Alumni Direct Microsoft Ads? No.

    Microsoft has heard your pleas: it's pulled its "Worst Tech Commercial Ever," which tried to use a puking theme to sell Internet Explorer. And you'll never guess who the director was! You will never guess. More »
    07/02/09
    9,060
    23

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by smokee: He should definitely go back to his day job. You know, directing such atrocious bombs as "Chappelle's Show", "The Man... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • badvertising

    Worst Tech Commercial Ever, Probably

    If Harry McCracken, who has been writing about personal computers for 29 years, says this Microsoft spot is the worst technology commercial ever, he's probably right. Warning: It's also gross. More »
    06/30/09
    17,611
    46

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by The Dominant Glee Club: Am I the only person who thinks both of these were awesome? Ineffective, sure, since downloading IE is like inviting... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    'The A-hole is Nasty'

    You thought that Hardees' "Name Our Holes" campaign was the pinnacle of pornographic fast food advertisement? You are correct. "The A-hole tastes funny," declares a guy in this ad, for greasy doughballs. Well, okay. Let's just drop it. [via Adfreak]
    06/30/09
    3,733
    25

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by The Dominant Glee Club: I thought you were supposed to go directly from the A-hole to the B-hole? Depending on which order you go... 1 Responses | Other threads

  • field guide

    Alex Bogusky Is That Ad Guy

    Have you ever known any "creative" advertising guys? Alex Bogusky is the epitome of that guy. He is not afraid to grow his hair long and wear a cool t-shirt and fashionable sneakers while sexing up your brand strategy! More »
    06/30/09
    6,344
    43

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by ninety_nine: For a minute there I thought you were describing Doug Jaeger. 4 Responses | Other threads

  • television

    The Death of Television Draws Ever Nearer

    The Supreme Court just effectively doubled the number of Americans who have access to ad-skipping DVR technology. TV is in trouble. More »
    06/29/09
    7,282
    67

    By John Cook

    Comment by lobstr: Great, that could only mean more product fucking placement. Go easy on us, NBC. I don't need to know Tina... 24 Responses | Other threads

  • Media Crack

    Still a Few More Years Before the Total Collapse of the NYT

    In your sad Monday media column: the New York Times will limp along a little longer, Iran locks up journalists while they're engrossed in Twitter, Tim Rutten is predictable, and the television industry loses a couple billion, no biggie. More »
    06/29/09
    2,943
    6

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by kneetoe: Well, good news about the VJ job, anyway. God was I awful. 1 Responses | Other threads

  • product placement

    How Are We Tricking Kids Into Using Condoms Today?

    Condoms: Are teenagers sufficiently aware of their existence? Despite being the subject of the world's highest number of bizarre ads, you can never be too sure. The newest ways to corrupt kids' minds, sexually: direct mail, and Leighton Meester videos. More »
    06/29/09
    4,710
    35

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Wrapitup: The larger question is why don't the kids already want to use condoms? If the answer is that parents don't... 17 Responses | Other threads

  • the truth

    Scientology Promises to Fill That Hole in Your Soul

    Perhaps prompted by the recent exits of blabbermouths spilling secrets, controversial religion Scientology has extended another large, bony arm of its latest promotional campaign guaranteed to rope in… who knows? More »
    06/26/09
    5,353
    39

    By Arun Irizarry

    Comment by mfnher: They had me at paperclips. 5 Responses | Other threads

  • Media Crack

    Iran Arrests Entire Newspaper

    In your overwhelmed Friday media column: Iran just arrests everyone, for reporting, Conde Nast's September prayers will not be answered, a new chairman at the FCC, and the Mark Sanford source remains at large. More »
    06/26/09
    3,024
    7

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by uncivily obedient: The Iranian government is run by jerks. Is that the besy you could come up with? 1 Responses | Other threads

  • America the dumb

    All Food Ads Now Hardcore Porn

    Burger King is selling sandwiches with blowjobs. Various female sex symbols orgasmically consume burgers in TV ads. What next? Hardee's asks you to "Name our Holes." Hardee's executives love to fuck biscuit dough. More »
    06/25/09
    9,885
    63

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Martiniman: Enough already, what we really want is the Wendy and the King sex tape to be released! Don't worry she's... 11 Responses | Other threads

  • trendwatch

    Lust, Hatred, Beauty, Food: BurgerSex Ads Will Never Die

    First Paris Hilton made a burger-fellating ad, and that went okay, so they had Padma Lakshmi do it, and people seemed to like that, so now this "Audrina Partridge" character has been trotted out to satisfy America's meat lust. More »
    06/24/09
    5,888
    48

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Steverino Begins: It's so weird that they're pretending all these burgers are penises in order to sell them to straight guys. You'd... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Eating a Burger King 'Super Seven Incher' Is Just Like Giving a Blow Job

    Yesterday our Hamilton Nolan blamed BK's financial woes on their "edgy" ad agency. Now tonight our pal Copyranter sent us their newest advertisement, a reeking of desperation creation he called the "most overtly blow-jobby ad I've ever seen." More »
    06/24/09
    62,211
    83

    By The Cajun Boy

    Comment by chelseabill: Anne is waiting. I could use some photoshop help for the meat. 4 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Google Games Bite Newspapers

    Desperate for online advertising, newspapers have learned to aggressively optimize their content for Google. The result: more traffic. Junky traffic. More »
    06/22/09
    2,840
    1

    By Ryan Tate

    Comment by BeverlyMioli: Nielson Online's data is not necessarily completely reliable. They have a panel of ~200,000 versus Compete's 2 mil and their... more » | Other threads

  • advertising

    World's Cleverest Ad Campaign Is Big Failure

    Sometimes a worthless "consumer" will see some very strategic high-concept ad that involves, say, a subservient chicken, and innocently ask, "How does that sell burgers?" And then the creative ad execs will chuckle at this un-strategic dunce, their target audience. More »
    06/22/09
    23,080
    68

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Wrapitup: The very thought of waking up suddenly in the middle of the night to see a guy next to me,... 7 Responses | Other threads

  • breaking

    Stupid comments found on Youtube.

    06/19/09
    483
    4
  • badvertising

    The Best of Bad Realtor Ads

    If you're a realtor, it's hard to differentiate yourself, because realtors are all pretty much the same. Doesn't stop them from trying though! In honor of the housing bust, we bring you the best of America's worst realtor ads. More »
    06/18/09
    8,019
    31

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by The-Littlest-Hobo: Why is he a sheep? WHY IS HE A SHEEP? Am I missing something? 3 Responses | Other threads

  • publicity stunts

    Che's Granddaughter Just Like Che: Naked, Covered in Produce

    Che Guevara's granddaughter Lydia has graciously decided to start a "vegetarian revolution" by posing for PETA with "the torso naked, covered only by a sling loaded with carrots as bullets." Good for her! As Che himself once said: More »
    06/18/09
    38,228
    136

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by I_b_meh: Why the fuck does anyone celebrate Che Guevara? Happy happy joy joy the stupidity has another generation. I hate humanity... 40 Responses | Other threads

  • marketing

    Is It Worth Keeping Kids Away From Cigarettes If It Means Less Money For Maxim?

    Last week, the federal government passed a bill that lets the FDA essentially control everything about how cigarettes are advertised and marketed. New restrictions could save thousands of lives. But wait, this could hurt magazines! Stop everything! More »
    06/18/09
    2,540
    20

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by irishflyesq: Yes, because Joe Camel put a cigarette in every teen's mouth. I am so tired of the media/advertising being blamed for... 5 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Perez Hilton's New Site to Showcase His Sensitive, Thoughtful Side

    Perez Hilton is launching a new website, his advertising agent reports, to "focus on longer-form, more advertiser-friendly content." Meaning, presumably, that the celebrity gossip can finally unleash his fearsome intellect. More »
    06/17/09
    10,704
    15

    By Ryan Tate
  • advertising

    Monte Carlo Welcomes Illiterate Savages

    Monte Carlo was built as a haven for wealthy, cultured Europeans. But the Monte Carlo resort in Vegas must attract the dregs of illiterate American new money. It does so with ads phonetically spelling out what awaits them. Botch, Teat. More »
    06/17/09
    3,376
    26

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Wrapitup: They lost me at "unpretentiously luxurious". I thought the whole point of luxury was to rub it in everyone else's... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • advertising

    Hippie Movement's Final Outcome: Diaper Branding Campaigns

    Maybe the iconic imagery of the '60s meant something in its own time, but today it's solely used as a nostalgia trigger to lure aging Baby Boomers into purchasing crap from massive corporations. Shut up and buy, you old hippies. More »
    06/17/09
    2,184
    17

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Dickdogfood: Methinks the boomers aren't the target demo for the Luvs commercials--aren't they now far too old to have children, and... 2 Responses | Other threads

  • what

    Okay, 'It's Hammertime'

    If you haven't already watched this video (ad, really) of a mob of golden-panted dancers flooding into a clothing store, unannounced, and performing the Hammer dance to "U Can't Touch This," what exactly are you doing on the internet?
    06/16/09
    9,500
    38

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by dolemite1975: + Watch video This is so much friggin' better. Sheesh. 5 Responses | Other threads

  • Media Crack

    Will Your Children Know the Magic of Television?

    In your variegated Wednesday media column: Television's death foretold, the magazine industry's resurgence predicted, the Boston Globe's hope springs eternal, and something for tattoo enthusiasts to read. More »
    06/16/09
    2,879
    10

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Evil Baby Ant Eater: Will Your Children Know The Magic Of TV? Yes, because it was a effing great babysitter for me, and I turned... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • scientology

    Scientology Hates Psychiatry, Loves Its Ads

    The Church of Scientology has launched a deeply creepy advertising campaign. They're buying spots on CNN's Anderson Cooper 360, and seem to have stolen the ad playbook from their arch-enemies in the pharmaceutical industry. More »
    06/16/09
    86,971
    64

    By John Cook

    Comment by Smitros: Who is finally going to grow a set and do an updated exposé on these people? I don't think there... 10 Responses | Other threads

  • stupid human feuds

    Palin Wins Battle In Letterman War

    Oh good, the people looking to get David Letterman fired because they don't like his monologue (admittedly it is usually pretty hacky but that is part of the charm!) just cost him one (1) internet advertiser. More »
    06/15/09
    8,839
    60

    By Pareene

    Comment by Muggs Bigglesworth: And Jezebel's out there crucifying people for not caring. Now I don't know what to think! 11 Responses | Other threads

  • surprise

    Drugs + Hookers= Thriving Ad Industry

    What do you know, Amsterdam is the new hot spot for ad agencies. Do you guess they're attracted by the tax breaks and diversity and public transportation and government investment and creative talent? Or... More »
    06/15/09
    6,224
    32

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by tigolbitties: can someone please tell me the draw of hookers? i just don't understand... who wants to dip into what (probably)... 11 Responses | Other threads

  • Media Crack

    Porn Mags You Read For The Stories Grow Less Lucrative

    In your finally Friday media column: Haaretz gets poetic, the Boston Globe gets profligate, Tim Russert gets remembered, and the newsy porn magazines get downsized: More »
    06/12/09
    4,065
    6

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by lolababy: Why is that whenever I see Haaretz I read it as 'Haaterz'? more » | Other threads

  • advertising

    Magazine Covers Now Smarter Than Magazine Ethics

    Magazine ad revenues are tanking, and many magazines are now selling ads on their covers, despite the fact that it's "not allowed." Seems like a clear-cut case of economics trumping ethics. But what happens when the cover ads are magic?? More »
    06/12/09
    2,735
    14

    By Hamilton Nolan

    Comment by Ohcaptainmycaptain: I never understood the title of this mag. I mean, is science "popular"? 4 Responses | Other threads

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