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Advertising
”You Have Hopscotch To Live For
How many times have you gazed out on the subway tracks during your daily commute, wishing only for the sweet release that hurling yourself upon them would provide? Plenty of times; you're reading this site, so we know your job sucks. Some people do throw themselves in front of trains, which represents not only a wasted life, but also a hugely inconvenient municipal clean-up job. So Washington, DC has ordered up some stuff to keep your mind occupied while you're on the platform—games like Hopscotch and "I Spy." The slogan on the games reads "Life is fun. Keep on living. Use caution around the tracks." Perhaps hopscotch was not the wisest choice, then? And let's be honest—the slogan of this campaign should really be, "Anything to Momentarily Distract You From Suicidal Thoughts." After the jump (ha), one of the "I Spy" games. This would only cure a very minimal level of depression: More »Disturbing Playstation Ad Will Put You Off Video Games Forever
Out of a Vienna ad agency comes this abomination of a Playstation 3 ad that, were there truly a God, would never have shone its dark light on world. Let me try to paint a verbal picture for you: it's a guy with a thumb for a penis. Plus-ten points to the ad agency for the excellent Photoshop work here; but minus-eight-billion points for ever letting this thing come into being. I never want to touch another Playstation as long as I live, much less another thumb. The full and uncut ad is below: beware. More »Menthol Cigarettes Are Not 'Flavored,' Says Dr. Kool Newport
How popular are menthol cigarettes? Popular enough to reverse logic. The government is set to pass a bill that will ban "flavored" cigarettes, but menthols will be excluded. Because menthol, of course, is not a flavor. What menthol is is close to $20 billion in sales for the tobacco industry. As well as an important part of African-American culture! Tobacco companies advertise menthol brands disproportionately to minority communities, and it obviously works, although nobody really knows why. What we do know is that this bill is perfect—it protects my precious Kools, while saving America from the strawberry menace: More »Raingear 2.0 for Douches
During my very brief stint at a fashion magazine, my boss sat me down one rainy morning and said, "I'm about to give you the most important advice you're ever gonna hear from me." I listened, soaking wet from the morning commute. "You're gonna need to buy some rain gear," she continued. "I don't care if you think it looks ugly. You gotta do it. And get some rain boots." Haven't done it yet, but... may we interest you in the next generation of rain gear? It's like an isolation-pod for your head. Staying out of the rain? Great. Looking like a total control-freak dork? Um... priceless. More »Dove 'Real Beauty' Scandal Oddly Unresolved
The aftermath of last week's Dove "Campaign for Real Beauty" photo retouching scandal remains unclear. It all started with retoucher Pascal Dangin telling the New Yorker that he had cleaned up photos for the campaign featuring ostensibly "Real" women, which would be a hugely hypocritical move. Dove, their ad agency, and celebrity photographer Annie Leibovitz all denied it, saying they did nothing to the pictures except "to remove dust and do color correction." Today, Ad Age tries to decide whether or not the fiasco will hurt Dove—and the company is still stonewalling, while the New Yorker is standing by (most of) its story. More »Titans Of Finance Undone By Larry The Cable Guy
When massive corporations decide to come up with a new slogan, they almost always end up with something short, trite, and massively expensive. Citigroup just unveiled its earth-shaking new slogan "Citi Never Sleeps," which is a reworking of its classic "The Citi Never Sleeps" tagline. But didn't they just spend $30 million last year launching a different slogan? Well yes, but that one didn't work out, because it sounded like it came straight from the mouth of bottom-rung redneck comedian Larry the Cable Guy. Derisive laughter is appropriate here: More »Dove Denies New Yorker Hypocrisy Allegations
Beauty product purveyor Dove has finally responded to allegations, first reported in a New Yorker story, that the company retouched photos of the "Real" women in its "Campaign for Real Beauty" ads. Which would make them big hypocrites. But according to a statement from Dove this morning (via its PR agency, Edelman), the New Yorker was wrong. The company even got a quotable refutation from controversy-courting celebrity photographer Annie Leibovitz! Their full denial is after the jump. More »Economy's Innocent Victims: Weird Ads
Sure, the current dicey economic climate has reduced America to nation of terrified food hoarders. But more importantly, it has cost us some of our annoying and unnecessarily strange advertising icons: Applebee's Wanda Sykes-voiced talking apple, and a bunch of guys running around in bizarre red pigtail wigs on behalf of Wendy's. Take a moment to mourn them. "Both campaigns were meant to attract younger diners," the Times reports. But they failed, because kids aren't doing as many drugs these days, I guess. The companies' new advertising strategy? "Hey, look at our food." More »How Many Viral Ads Have Copied The One That Got Three Million Views?
Apparently there's only one script for viral ads on the Internet: Guy does small trick with product, guy does bigger trick with product, guy's friends tell camera, each other, bystanders and guy how awesome he is. There's always music in the background and you can always tell it's fake. I just explained how the same ad agency that did this for Ray-Ban last year just did it for Levi's; apparently Coors hired someone for a cut-rate version in this terribly staged YouTube "viral video" of Coors can tricks, shown below (along with a cute little parody). More »How Levi's Jeans Duped The Internet With Their New Secret Ad
My friends are blogging about this viral video of guys doing backflips into their jeans. So neat! So shareable! So worth the million views the three-day-old clip already earned! But I could tell instantly (and I have no idea why no one else did) that this was a stealth ad — because it's a direct copy of a stealth ad that got over 3 million views last year. More »
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