AllDay: Al's Video Blog: A Brief Studio Tour [MSNBC]

Here's an example of how an offhand remark can quickly escalate into something awkward—or worse. On this morning's "Today Show," Meredith Vieira and the kids were talking about Tim Hardaway, the former NBA player who isn't super fond of the gays. One thing leads to another, and all of a sudden we're talking about tire marks on Al Roker's butt. Nobody tell the dude from TV on the Radio.

As for Barbara Walters, Jones said, "I still have her in my heart." But only because the lady can no longer fit in her stomach, of course.

Earlier: Gawker's Slaphappy Coverage of Star Jones

Oh, Al Roker will talk to the Kentucky lesbians. But let them mention "fast women," and whoa! whoa! whoa!

[via Good As You]

OK, the sound quality sucks. And, yeah, it's from yesterday morning. And, granted, it's a "news" segment that little more than a marketing pitch for both a time when you actually watched NBC's scripted shows and a new DVD in which the network presumably has a stake. But, even so, you gotta watch Al Roker singing the Facts of Life theme on the Today show. Watch it once and it's amusing. Then watch it again, playing close attention to the last little bit of the song. You won't be able to look away.

Per usual, this is all uncomfirmed, but: We'd heard that Al Roker Productions was hitting the red carpet at the Ziegfield premiere for a 30-minute live show on NBC. The plan was simple — Cruise dramatically rides up the Hudson in a speedboat, then literally runs to the red carpet for the Roker interview. Unfortunately, it seems that the someone at the studio has not only refused to let Roker conduct the interview, but also forbade the jolly weatherman from interviewing anyone in the cast.

So why the last-minute refusal? Supposedly (and that's a big supposedly) it's because Roker also co-hosts the Today show with Cruise's mortal enemy, the Ritalin and SSRI-supporting Matt Lauer.

Lesson learned: Get "glib" with The Cruise, and everyone suffers.

Earlier: Tom Cruise's NYC Itinerary

After the jump, more keepsake photos of "the ebony and ivory of our time."

"I don't know — it feels awful tight down there."

Obligatory crotch-shot.

"Actually, this feels kinda good now."

So fast, so hard.

The men smile, their faces aglow with post-luge bliss. Again! Again!

To recap: Live television, Matt Lauer, power bottom, snug little speed suits. Clearly, the real romance goes down tomorrow.

"Today" Show s Lauer and Roker do Doubles Luge [USOC]

Both are fine, but the papers' accounts make clear it was quite a dramatic event when it happened. We found ourselves wishing we'd been watching the live NBC broadcast so we could have seen it for ourselves, rather than merely relying on the eyewitness accounts in the local papers. We were sure seasoned newsmen like Katie Couric, Matt Lauer, and Al Roker — the parade broadcast's hosts — would have kept us posted on what was happening, and we had no doubt a top-notch news organization like NBC would have found some good pictures to broadcast.

Of course, we would have been wrong. The Times reports:

[W]hen the time came in the tightly scripted three-hour program for the M&Ms' appearance, NBC weaved in tape of the balloon crossing the finish line at last year's parade - even as the damaged balloon itself was being dragged from the accident scene. At 11:47 a.m., as an 11-year-old girl and her 26-year-old sister were being treated for injuries, the parade's on-air announcers - Katie Couric, Matt Lauer and Al Roker - kept up their light-hearted repartee from Herald Square, where the parade ends.

"Will these classic candymen get out of this delicious dilemma?" Mr. Roker asked, referring not to the accident but to the premise of the attraction, a red M&M's attempt to save his yellow counterpart, who had been blown from the basket of a hot-air balloon.

It's America's first morning-news family, folks.

While Others Reported Accident, NBC Stuck to Sunny Re-Broadcast of Last Year's M&M's [NYT]
Related:
Parade Hit By a New 'Blow' [NYP]
Again! Light Falls on Parade [NYDN]
Parade Balloon Hits Light Pole, Injuring Two [NYT]

Full frame-by-frame fun is after the jump.

Earlier: Great Moments in TV Weather Reporting

This morning on the Today show. Al Roker reporting from Florida on the hurricane. The camera pans out to show how Al is being held in place by a cameraman who has literally wrapped himself around Roker's leg to weigh him down. The camera stays on this odd lovefest, and a few seconds later Al proceeds to topple into the ground, more or less on top of the cameraman still strapped to his leg. They cut to Matt and Katie, and Katie says, "Wouldn't it have been easier to just hold onto the rail fence behind him?"

Even easier: Stop going outside in the fucking hurricanes. (Or, at least, skip the gastric bypass.)

[Got a screenshot of TiVo'd version or something? Send it in and we'll love you forever.]

Today [MSNBC.com]

"A former Israeli intelligence officer, Tamar will show us how to make the most of our loving relationship with dogs," Roker said. "And if you do not watch the show, she knows 17 different ways to kill you with a paper clip. That's television!"

Yes, Al, that's television! And the sound of your brain being decimated with that very paper clip!

Roker Peddles Dog Reality TV Program [AP]

End of segment, cut to Al Roker, who sure does look fantastic after that gastric bypass surgery!

Wonder what Diane Sawyer is up to right now.

Interesting. I've always harbored a sneaking suspicion that Mr. Champion is really just a computer-generated image. The evidence:
· A.) his name is Sam Champion. Seriously. It sounds too much like a Marvel comic book character to be authentic.
· B.) He looks shockingly like Ken, of "Ken and Barbie" fame—plastic smile and all. Watch the weather reports to see if the man ever blinks. I'll bet he doesn't. Why? Because the eyes are NOT REAL!
· C.) He's frighteningly enthusiastic about things like cold fronts. It's big faux pas to be frighteningly enthusiastic about anything in Manhattan, but if you must, cold fronts are not appropriate. And they're not normal. But, hey, it's your call.
Reading between the lines [Tales from the City, via 601am.com]